


The Grounders MC

by WhatTheWhat14



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-22
Updated: 2018-05-21
Packaged: 2018-05-28 07:41:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 17
Words: 33,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6320509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhatTheWhat14/pseuds/WhatTheWhat14
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Grounders Motorcycle Club is all Lexa Woods has ever known. Starting from birth, she's working her way up to VP and has the respect of the other members and rival MCs.</p><p>Clarke Griffin is a renowned surgeon from Seattle who has moved to California to be closer to her mother after her father's tragic death. </p><p>Worlds collide, and neither woman could anticipate the turn their lives would take.</p><p>(Inspired by Sons of Anarchy)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, I got back into Sons of Anarchy recently and couldn't help but imagine Lexa as Jax and Clarke as Tara (sue me).
> 
> Please feel free to leave comments and let me know what you think!
> 
> Enjoy :)

“I’m going to give you  _one_   _more_   _chance_ , Murphy,” Lexa snapped, tightening her hold of the man’s long, greasy hair as she spoke. “Tell me who blew up the warehouse, and you can leave here in one piece.” The bloody man whimpered, clearly exhausted from the torture the brunette woman had inflicted on him. 

“I  _told_  you,” he cried, trying to find a more comfortable position as his hands were chained behind his back, connected to a car lift inside the auto shop. “I’m just a truck driver! I don’t know anything about it!”

Lexa gave him another swift kick to his ribs, ensuring that a few of the bones snapped under the pressure of her steel-toed boots. He screamed in pain and she moved over to the button that lifted the chains, putting more strain on the man’s shoulders, causing him to yelp once more.

“You’re making this  _pretty_  difficult for yourself, you fucking idiot,” she spat. She was growing tired of dealing with the man, but she needed answers. She couldn’t return to Titus empty-handed. “If you’re ‘just a trucker’, then you can tell me who the  _fuck_  blew up the warehouse. I know you were there, you little rat. Now,” she began, moving closer to the man who was crying and subsequently drooling all over himself, “if I hear  _one_  more lie leave your sorry lips, you will leave me no choice but to put a bullet through your stupid head. So, tell me: who blew up the warehouse?”

The man continued to cry and the woman pulled the pistol from the back of her pants, putting the end against the man’s temple. When he didn’t answer, she unlocked the safety with a loud clicking noise. The woman was seconds from pulling the trigger before she heard him scream.

“AZGEDA!” He yelped, crying harder than he had earlier. “It was the Azgeda…” he trailed off, realizing he would be a dead man even if he left the auto shop alive.

“ _Who_  from the Azgeda?” She pressed. He shook his head vigorously in return.

“I swear I don’t know! I couldn’t see. It...it was two guys. That’s all I saw I swear!” Lexa stood back up and considered what the man had told her. The information would be enough - for now.

“Get rid of him,” she ordered, and two of the members worked to take the chains off of the battered man as she strode out of the auto shop towards the clubhouse. She was fuming - not only because of how long the confession from the truck driver had taken, but more so because of the fact that their warehouse had been burned down. And now, she knew it was one of their rivals - The Azgeda. Who were responsible for the growing heroin problem in her hometown and the bane of her existence.

She entered the clubhouse to find Titus in his plush leather arm chair with one hand on a beer and the other hand around the waist of an unfamiliar woman who was sitting on his lap. Lexa knew better than to ask for an introduction - she would probably never see the woman again after tonight.

“We were right. It was the Azgeda,” Lexa said as she sat across from the older man on a worn-out leather couch. Titus nodded in response and took a drink from his beer, clearly enjoying the much-younger blonde who was looking at him, biting her lip.

“They’ll pay for what they’ve done,” he replied simply before a smile crept across his face. “But tonight, we celebrate.”

Lexa quirked an eyebrow, completely unsure why there was a celebration to be had. Titus smiled in response and slapped woman’s ass before he explained.

“Just got a call from Gustus. It’s a boy!” He yelled and Lexa nearly jumped out of her seat.

“Why the fuck didn’t anyone tell me!” She said with a huge smile across her face. “How’s mama doing? Is the baby okay?” She asked with obvious concern as she headed for the door.

“Anya is doing great and so is the baby. Get your ass over to the hospital so Crystal and I can properly celebrate the newest member of The Grounders.” He smiled devilishly as the busty woman moved to straddle the man, taking his face in between her hands as she began to grind her hips against him. Lexa rolled her eyes as she made her way back outside and onto her bike, spotting the truck driver being loaded into the back of their blacked-out commercial van. Lincoln looked back at her and she nodded, signaling for him to follow club protocol and dump the man in the middle of nowhere.

The brunette started her bike and sped out of the auto yard and into the dark California night.

 

\-----------------------

 

Lexa reached the hospital in no time, and walked through the double doors before stopping at the front desk to find out where the maternity unit was located. The young woman at the information desk looked her up and down, obviously checking the biker out. Lexa smiled to herself. She knew the leather biker vest usually did it for chicks, and this girl in front of her was no different than the many girls before her. 

The brunette biker flashed the girl a smile before sauntering off towards the elevator, noticing in a nearby mirror that the girl checked Lexa out as she walked away.

 _Maybe_   _I’ll_   _have_   _a_   _little_   _celebration_   _of_   _my_   _own_   _tonight_ , Lexa thought to herself as she entered the elevator and headed to the third floor.

Once the metal doors opened to the third floor, she got out and spotted Gustus right away. The large man was hard to miss with his six foot-four frame, giant build, long beard and tattoos littering his arms and neck. He turned to see her, and wrapped the girl up in a giant hug when she reached him.

“Congrats you old fuck, you’re finally a dad,” she said and the man laughed as he playfully pushed her away.

“‘Bout time you show up and see your godson,” he countered, catching Lexa off-guard.

“ _Godson_?” She questioned, her voice soft and she looked up at him with a shocked look on her face.

“I can’t think of a better person for the job,” he responded, putting a reassuring hand on the brunette’s shoulder. Lexa wasn’t about to cry, but her eyes were misty as she wrapped the man in another hug.

“I would be honored.” He nodded and smiled as he pointed a finger through the glass of the nursery to a baby sleeping soundly in the back row.

“That’s him right there,” he said, a proud grin plastering his bearded face. Lexa followed where he was pointing and she felt her entire chest swarm with warmth and her breath hitched in her throat.

“He’s perfect, Gus.” The man smiled his most genuine smile, revealing wrinkled lines from his eyes. “How’s Anya doing?”

“She’s doing well. The doc is in there now doing a checkup and giving her some pain medication. You should be able to go in there once Dr. Griffin is done. I know Anya could use some girl time,” he joked and Lexa laughed as she noticed an older brunette woman leaving the nearby room, flashing Gustus a smile before heading towards the pair.

“Dr. Griffin, this is Lexa. Lexa, this is Dr. Abby Griffin.” Lexa shook her hand as the other woman looked her up and down, presumably noticing the biker vest and maybe a few spots of blood that Lexa had forgotten to clean off her boot from her earlier endeavors.

“So,  _you’re_  the infamous Lexa?” Abby said with an eyebrow quirked questioningly. When Lexa didn’t respond, the doctor continued. “Anya’s been asking about you for hours. You better head in there before she loses her mind,” she joked and Lexa smiled before moving past the doctor and into her best friend’s hospital room. 

“Where the fuck have you been, Lexa?!” Anya practically yelled, causing Lexa to raise both of her hands in mock-surrender.

“I’m sorry! Duty calls, my lady. Hey, cute fucking kid by the way,” she said before hugging the woman in her bed. “Good thing he got all your good looks and not his father’s.”

“I’m just glad he’s finally out of my body,” she said, exhaustion obviously wracking her body. “Are you ever going to get your shit together, find a nice girl and start a family? I want to be an aunt, dammit.” Lexa laughed,  _really_  laughed and rolled her eyes.

“Those painkillers must be kicking in,” she responded playfully and Anya slapped her, surprising the younger woman sitting next to her.

“I’m serious, Lexa. Enough of this ‘love is weakness’ bullshit you keep hanging onto.” Lexa groaned and wanted nothing to do with this conversation.

“Anya, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you: the club comes first. I don’t have time for love.”

“ _Bullshit_ , Lex. You don’t have time for love but you have time to fuck random girls every other night?” The younger brunette woman averted her gaze and stayed silent. “Now that I’m a mother, I get to impart some of my newfound motherly wisdom, so listen the fuck up,” she spat, lifting her hand to grab Lexa’s chin so the woman was looking at her best friend. “There’s more to life than this club. Yes, it’s important. But I  _refuse_  to let you end up like Titus. That old fuck is power hungry and alone. Keyword being ‘alone’. He’s spent his whole fucking life making sure he was in control, had the most power and look where it’s gotten him. It’s lonely at the top, Lex. Don’t forget that.”

All Lexa could do was nod, letting Anya’s word sink in before her best friend rested her head back on the pillow.

“Good. Now, if you know what’s good for you, you’ll go get me a cheeseburger and curly fries from In and Out. I’m  _starving_ ,” she groaned and Lexa laughed before getting up and walking out of her friends room towards the elevator. She saw Dr. Griffin at the nurses station talking to another woman.

Upon closer inspection, it wasn’t just any woman, but an  _absolutely_   _stunning_  woman with blue eyes and the perfect shade of blonde hair.

“What’s the hospital protocol on In and Out burgers?” Lexa asked, stopping to ask the doctor. She really didn’t care if Anya could have it or not. She needed to find out who this stunning woman was.

“If I know Anya, it’s in your best interest to make sure she gets that burger,” Abby joked and Lexa smiled before turning her attention to the blonde, who had a small smile of her own tugging at her lips.

“Well if it’s doctor’s orders...I’m Lexa, by the way,” she said before extending her hand. The blonde reciprocated calmly before speaking. 

“Clarke Griffin,” she responded and Lexa tilted her head and looked at Abby, confusion written all over Lexa’s face.

“Yes, Lexa, she’s my daughter.” Lexa hummed in approval and smiled back at the blonde.

“Well it’s nice to meet you, Clarke,” she said, enunciating the hard ‘k’ sound in the blonde’s name. “What do you do here at the hospital?”

“I’m a trauma surgeon,” she replied cooly and Lexa must have smiled and stared a little too long at the blonde before the older Griffin coldly interjected.

“The burger, Lexa,” she said and the brunette looked back at her with a blank stare. “Go get Anya the burger and fries.” Lexa smiled smugly before continuing to walk to the elevator, only looking back towards the two women when she entered and winking as the blonde caught a quick look before the doors closed.

 _Forget about that girl at the front desk_ , Lexa thought to herself.  _Dr. Clarke Griffin has my full attention_.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments! I guess you guys like this story as much as I do :)
> 
> I decided to kind of switch back and forth between Lexa's and Clarke's POV, per say. Let me know if it get's too confusing and I'll find a way to make it more clear. 
> 
> Enjoy and as always, please feel free to leave comments!

Dr. Clarke Griffin, renowned surgeon who graduated summa cum laude from Stanford University, was top of her class in medical school at UCLA, and sailed through her medical boards and internships with ease, was overwhelmed.

Not because her new job was overwhelming. Hell, she’d really only had a couple of interesting cases in the week she’d been at the new hospital.

She was overwhelmed because her furniture was still on it’s way from Seattle, leaving her to live in her mother’s guest bedroom. While she loved her mother and cared for her more than anyone else, living under her roof in her late 20s was less than ideal.

Not to mention the lecturing she had received after meeting that biker chick...Lexa, was it?

_“Clarke, I’m telling you she is bad news. More than bad news! She’s a gang banger and the things she’s done-”_

_“Mom, you seriously don’t have to give me this talk right now.”_

_“Clarke, I saw the way you looked back at her. I know you and I’m telling you to stay away from her. She’s nothing but trouble.”_

_“Are you done?” Clarke asked, arms folded across her chest in defiance. “Listen, I’m an adult, mom. I can assure you the only thing I’m focused on right now is work, not some girl wearing a leather vest with a patch on it, okay? Calm down. Take care of some babies. Bring new life into this world or whatever it is you do,” she joked, earning an eye roll from her mother._

That was 24 hours ago, and the blonde had another 12 hours left on this shift before she could go back to her mother’s house and get some much needed rest. But before she could even think about that, her pager was going off for a trauma activation in the ER for a GSW to the chest.

_Finally_ , Clarke thought as she ran down the hallway, _some fucking action_.

 

\-------------------------

 

The ER was almost in complete chaos when Clarke finally arrived. People were yelling, not only nurses to doctors and vis versa, but big burly bikers were yelling too.

“What’s the story?” Clarke asked as she tied her paper trauma gown behind her back and put on the mask to cover her mouth and face from all of the blood strewn about the large room.

“29 year old male with a GSW with the right chest. He’s already lost liters of blood between the field and the ambulance and we can’t get a clear image of his chest to see where the bullet is lodged,” the nurse said quickly.

“No exit wound?”

“Negative, doctor.”

Clarke looked around at the frantic scene in front of her, working through the details quickly in her mind.

“Get the patient intubated and get me a chest tube kit. Book an OR. We need to find that bullet before it springboards into an internal organ or his spine.” Everyone around her seemed to shift their focus, listening to the young blonde and doing as she said. She looked at the man’s vitals and noticed his blood pressure was still dangerously low.

“Let’s get as many units of blood as we can in here and in the OR, please!” She yelled before taking a seat next to the man, preparing to insert the chest tube in hopes of draining some of the blood that was taking up space in the man's chest. She found the space between his two rib bones, and made a small incision before inserting the tube which immediately began draining blood from his chest. A small sigh of relief came from Clarke’s lips as she got up and looked at his vitals, which slowly improved.

“Alright let’s get him moved up to the OR before he bleeds out,” she said, removing the paper gown and mask before throwing them in the trash. She exited the chatotic room to prepare for the surgery, when a hand on her forearm turned her around.

“Clarke,”

The blonde spun around to see Lexa, covered in blood from her face to her boots.

“Lexa, what happened out-”

“That doesn’t matter. Is he going to be okay?” She asked frantically. The blonde opened her mouth then pursed her lips.

“We’re going to do everything we can,” she responded, knowing full-well that explanation wouldn’t be enough for the other woman.

“Don’t _bullshit_ me, Clarke,” Lexa spat, trying her best not to snap at the blonde in front of her while tightening her grip on the doctor's forearm.

“He’s dying, but if you let me go, I will do my very fucking best to make sure that doesn’t happen.” Lexa released her hold from the other woman’s arm and watched as she ran down the hallway towards the surgical floor.

 

\-------------------

 

Hours had passed and countless units of blood had been given to the man who was lying on Clarke’s operating table. Still alive, but barely.

Clarke stepped down from the table as the rest of her surgical team prepped the man to be transported to the recovery area. She removed her gown and mask before entering the scrub room to wash her arms and hands. Her mind was completely preoccupied by medicine: everything the man would need in the next 24 hours in hopes of keeping him alive. She took a deep breath before exiting the room and heading towards the waiting area where she knew the entire gang was waiting for an update.

The first to jump out of their chair was of course Lexa. The blonde took note of her eagerness before putting her hand up, motioning for all of them to take a seat so she could properly address them all without a million questions being asked at once.

“For starters, he’s alive,” she said and felt the collective breath that everyone seemed to be holding finally release. “He is by no means out of the woods. He suffered a pulmonary laceration which resulted in a giant hemothorax. Basically, his right lung was struck and torn by the bullet which caused massive bleeding in his chest cavity. However, he’s extremely lucky. We were able to locate the bullet and remove it. It missed his heart by millimeters and lodged in his scapula less than an inch away from his spinal cord."

“When can we see him?” One of the men asked from the corner.

“Not for a few hours. I need to monitor him without any disturbances. I can’t stress how important the next 12 to 24 hours will be for him.” They all nodded and hummed, trying to process what the blonde has just told them about their brother. She nodded and turned on her heel, but felt a gentle tap on her shoulder before she reached a set of double doors.

“Clarke, I’m sorry about earlier,” Lexa said as the blonde turned around to face the slightly taller brunette.

“You don’t need to apologize,” the blonde responded without any trace of emotion on her face.

_Medicine_ , Clarke reminded herself, _focus on the medicine_.

“I snapped at you, Clarke, and I’m sorry. I know you’re doing your best and I just...I want you to know how much we all appreciate it.” Clarke nodded before turning around and walking through the double doors. It wasn’t until she heard them close behind her that she let out the breath she didn’t know she was holding.

What she couldn’t help thinking about was the compassion that was oozing from the girl who just yesterday undressed Clarke with her eyes. How could that be the same girl? One minute she was the badass gang member who truly believed she could take home any girl she wanted, and the next she was apologizing to someone she barely knew because she “snapped” at her.

The blonde shook her head as she opened the doors to the recovery area, finding the biker in a room with chirping machines that were currently keeping him alive. She retrieved the man’s medical chart and started flipping through the pages, comparing the notes to the figures now flashing on the monitor to the left of the man’s bed.

_O2 sats are better_ , Clarke thought to herself, reviewing the vitals from when the man first arrived at the hospital. _BP is still a little low, but not terrible. Heart rate is steady_.

The man was alive and stable - for now.

Clarke hoped it stayed that way.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for the comments! I'm really glad you're as into this story as I am :)
> 
> This chapter is pretty long, so I hope you enjoy it! As always, please feel free to leave comments and feedback!

Lexa opened and closed her switchblade, waiting for the remaining members of the MC to make their way into the smoke-filled conference room inside the clubhouse. The air was thick with tension, and it took everything within the brunette not to storm out of the room and take care of the Azgeda herself. Almost a day after Nyko had been shot, he still wasn’t able to wake up and remained in a medically induced coma.

Between her biker brother taking a bullet and the warehouse being burned down, Lexa was seething with rage.

The conference room door finally closed, and all eyes were on Titus at the head of the old wooden table with their patch etched into the middle.

“I’m not going to explain why we are all here,” he began as his eyes took a deeper hue than normal. “The Azgeda have blown up our warehouse, our _livelihood_ , and tried to take out one of our own.” Lexa noticed his clenched fists that had taken residence on the table. “Now we figure out how to carry out our revenge.”

Everyone around the room nodded and grunted in agreeance before the brunette spoke.

“Blood _must_ have blood,” she said loudly, but not quite yelling. The room quieted down to hear what the young woman had in mind. “The Azgeda have increased their supply of dope in _our_ town, and it has to end. I say we hit them where it would hurt the most - their heroin supply.” Everyone in the room looked around at each other, and then to Titus, who was eyeing Lexa carefully. “They tried to take away our guns by blowing up the warehouse. Now we do the same to them.”

“Do we know where they’re supplying from?” Titus asked carefully, and a devilish smile crept onto Lexa’s lips as she retrieved something from her back pocket.

“This,” she said, holding up an iPhone in a clear ziplock bag, “has all of the answers for us. The truck driver from the other day knew more than he gave up. He’s been running the drugs from Mexico to the Azgeda for quite awhile now, and he’s stupid enough to keep the details in his phone.” The brunette watched as smiles crept onto the faces of the other men in the room. “There’s an old market off highway 3 a few miles outside of town - that’s where they’re running from.”

“And what do you propose?” Titus asked, leaning forward in his chair with his eyes directly on the woman to his right.

“We have Gustus do what he does best: _blow that mother fucker up_.” The room fell silent in anticipation as Titus took a long look at Lexa before turning his attention to Gustus, who was standing by the doors.

“Gustus, can you make this happen?” Titus asked simply and all eyes fell to the tall, bearded man who simply nodded his head before a simple “yes” fell from his lips. Titus picked up his gavel and looked around the room before striking the wood.

“We seek revenge tomorrow night,” he said before striking the gavel with authority.

 

\------------------------------------

 

“You’re looking like _quite_ the natural over there,” Anya joked as she watched Lexa hold her newborn son, shifting her feet and gently rocking the child back and forth in her arms.

“I’m just ready to be the cool godparent. Don’t get it twisted,” Lexa replied, never taking her attention off the small child. Anya rolled her eyes and took a deep breath, sitting up in her bed before turning the TV off, finally grabbing the younger woman’s attention.

“Do I even want to know what revenge is going to look like?” She asked, speaking softly. Lexa looked up at her and noticed the worry behind the new mother’s eyes.

“Probably not,” she hesitated, moving to bring the child back to his mother. Anya took the baby and cradled him so naturally that Lexa wondered how he was only their first child.

“Does it involve Gus?” Anya asked and Lexa looked out the window, trying her best to avert her gaze from the other woman’s. She knew Anya was well aware of club business and never questioned their activities or intentions, but Lexa knew that once a child is involved in a family, priorities could change. Many club members before Gustus had taken different roles or left the club all-together once children were in the picture.

“Yes,” Lexa replied and noticed the other woman’s breath hitch in her throat. “But Anya, I promise _nothing_ is going to happen to him. I will make sure of it, okay?” She saw her best friend nod slightly, and the younger brunette brought her hand to rest on the other woman’s shoulder.

“Don’t get yourself killed either, idiot. I’d be _so_ fucking pissed at if something happened to you.” Lexa let out a small laugh and rolled her eyes. Anya always knew how to lighten the mood.

A nurse walked in to check how the new mother was healing, and Lexa took that as her cue to leave the room. She loved Anya like a sister, but she was not prepared to see the damage having a child had done to her body. Lexa said her goodbyes to the woman and decided to head back to the auto shop. Between Anya and Nyko, the brunette had been in the hospital more than she liked. Plus, the younger Dr. Griffin wasn’t on-call, so there wasn’t any extra incentive to stick around.

 

\---------------------

 

It was three in the morning as Gustus and Lexa waited in the nearby treeline with the market perfectly in sight. The pair had been swift in placing the dynamite and charges around the building, adding gasoline for extra measure. If they were going to do this, Lexa had told Gustus, they were going to do it big.

She looked to her left and nodded at the man. Silently, she counted down from five on her hand and watched as his finger hovered over the button that would blow the building to pieces. As she reached zero, the man’s finger hit the button, and one by one, the building started to blow apart.

The pair made a run for the truck that was parked nearby as the blasts got louder. The brunette couldn’t help the smile that was plastered on her face as she neared the truck, but the last blast rocked the ground so hard and she flew into the passenger door shoulder-first.

“FUCK!” She screamed as Gustus jumped behind the wheel. The searing pain in her right shoulder was enough for the woman to see stars.

“Lexa, get in! We need to get the fuck out of here!” Gustus yelled, opening the door to his old Ford pickup so the woman could dive in. Once she managed to move herself in far enough, the man hit the gas and they were on the road.

“Holy fucking _shit_ ,” Lexa said between clenched teeth. She knew pain - fights had been a regular part of her upbringing, not to mention stabbings here and there once she became more involved in the club - but the pain in her shoulder, which was now creeping down her arm, was worse than anything she had experienced lately.

“Are you okay?” Gustus said between breaths, navigating his way back to town on a route he knew the police wouldn’t be taking to the explosion.

“Never fucking better,” she said dryly, flexing her hand to make sure she still had feeling in her fingers. She heard her burner phone ringing, and looked to see Titus on the caller I.D.

“Yeah,” she answered with her eyes closed, trying to slow her breaths. What she heard on the other end of the phone shook her senses and she looked at Gustus. “Okay we’re on our way...yeah it’s done...yeah….yeah okay.” She flipped the phone closed and saw the bearded man looking at her questioningly.

“Head to the hospital. Nyko’s awake.”

 

\------------------------

 

Lexa and Gustus changed into new clothes and washed their faces before entering the hospital, leaving no trace of the proceedings from the explosion. It was early in the morning, just before 4am, but a group of Grounders had taken over the ICU waiting to be able to see their brother. The brunette was still favoring her shoulder, but did her best not to bring attention to the injury, fearing questions being brought up in public.

Instead, she was greeted by smiles and nods from her fellow members, and she figured they must have heard about the successful business trip she had just been on. She nodded back at them, her expression blank and unreadable.

Titus waved her over to the double doors that led to the patient rooms, and she followed him to see Nyko laying in bed, pain obvious in his face, but a small smile crept onto his lips when he spotted the club’s VP.

“Lexa,” he croaked, his throat dry and irritated from the intubation tube. She walked to his side and gave him the biggest hug she could muster, yelping slightly when her shoulder moved at the contact. “Are you okay?” Nyko asked suddenly, and the brunette did her best to hold back tears that were threatening to fall.

“Occupational hazard,” she said with a smile, but Nyko was unconvinced.

So was the blonde that entered the room.

“Lexa, what’s wrong with your shoulder?” She asked bluntly, startling the brunette who turned to look at the doctor.

“I just - it’s fine really. Just took a spill earlier and it’s a little...sore.” She watched the way Clarke’s eyebrow quirked, and felt her stomach drop at the sight. The blonde took another step forward and simply poked at the brunette’s shoulder, causing Lexa to nearly double over in pain with another yelp leaving her lips.

“Your shoulder is dislocated, Lexa,” she said with a slight roll of her eyes. She took a deep breath and looked around the rest of the ICU, finding it completely quiet except for the few nurses scattered about.

“Come with me.” Clarke gently grabbed the woman’s good arm and led her to an empty patient room, closing the doors and drawing the curtains while the brunette sat on the edge of the bed. She turned back to see Lexa with her eyes closed, gently rubbing the dislocated shoulder.

“I’ll need you to take the vest, sweatshirt and whatever is underneath it off so I can take a better look.” Lexa looked back at her and didn’t move, contemplating her next move and what to say next.

 _I could say something stupid_ , she thought. _Tell her she should ask me out to dinner first before we get to the part where she takes my clothes off_.

Instead, the brunette began attempting to take her own clothes off, but couldn’t even manage to get the vest halfway off without wincing in pain.

“Here,” Clarke said, moving in front of the woman to help her undress. Lexa’s breath hitched in her throat at the close proximity to the beautiful doctor, and noticed the perfume the other woman was wearing, which made her more relaxed.

Once her clothes were finally off, she saw the blonde hesitate in front of her as she slowly began palpitating her right shoulder. There was immediate pain, but also a burning sensation under the doctor’s touch.

Lexa was no doctor, but she was pretty sure the burning had nothing to do with the injury itself. She felt herself relax into the touch ever so slightly, noticing the quick glance the blonde gave her way and the small smile that crept onto her lips.

“So, are you always this clumsy or are you lying to me about how you managed to dislocate your shoulder?” Clarke asked, looking back at Lexa as she moved around the bed to grab an ice pack from the freezer in the room. 

“Would it make a difference either way?” The brunette replied coyly. She saw the blonde roll her eyes, playfully Lexa noted, as the doctor moved back to stand in front of the patient.

“That depends on whether you think I’m a complete moron or not.”

 _I think you’re fucking beautiful_ , Lexa thought. She kept that to herself.

“Club business. Nothing to worry about,” she replied instead, looking into the doctor’s blue eyes.

“Alright well,” Clarke started, moving to position herself to reset the other woman’s shoulder, “this is going to hurt like a bitch, to be completely honest. It’ll feel a hundred times better after, though.” She saw Lexa nod and clench her jaw in anticipation. “Okay on the count of three; one, two-”

“FU-UK!” Lexa yelled, feeling the doctor snap her shoulder back into place. She felt as though she was on the verge of blacking out from the sudden onset of pain. However, within seconds, the pain was subsiding, and she was well aware of the fact that tears had escaped her eyes.

“Are you okay?” The doctor asked, handing the other woman a few tissues. Lexa could only nod, knowing her ego was bruised from literally crying in front of her crush.

 _Her crush_. She closed her eyes at the thought. _Goddammit I have a fucking crush_.

“Alright, that shoulder is going to be pretty sore for the next couple of days, so try to keep ‘club business’ to a minimum. Or at least take yourself out of the big action, okay? Did you hit your head at all when you...fell?” The blonde asked, her voice laced with concern. She grabbed Lexa’s face in her hands and looked into her eyes for any signs of a head injury.

Nine times out of ten, Lexa would grab the other woman’s face and pull her into a kiss. The brunette had done it many times before with a handful of women whose names she couldn’t remember. _It would be so easy_ , she thought to herself. _She’s obviously flirting with you_.

Instead, she swallowed hard and looked back at the doctor in front of her.

“No just landed with my shoulder,” the brunette replied quietly, practically whispering, before sitting up and blinking a few times while wiping her face with her left hand. Clarke nodded and grabbed a sling from one of the cabinets.

“You’re going to have to wear this for a few days.” The blonde saw the eye roll and a small laugh escape the other woman. “Lexa, I’m _serious_. Promise me you’ll wear this sling or your shoulder will never heal properly.” The brunette smiled flirtatiously and shrugged.

“Doctor’s orders, right?” The blonde quirked her eyebrow again. “I _promise_ I’ll wear the sling, Clarke.” The blonde nodded in satisfaction and began helping the brunette put her clothes back on, something Lexa enjoyed a little too much. How gentle the doctor was and how the brunette’s skin burned at every touch the blonde’s fingers made against her skin. How her knuckles brushed against Lexa’s ribs when she slid her shirt over her head and down her torso. How the blonde zipped up Lexa’s hoodie to the very top, the way Lexa preferred. How the doctor seemed to “accidentally” brush her hand over the “Vice President” patch on Lexa’s vest before looking into the brunette’s eyes. How she meticulously adjusted the sling so it sat comfortably for the brunette.

_I’ve got it bad. I’ve got it bad for Dr. Clarke Griffin._

“Alright, so painkillers-”

“Don’t need them,” Lexa said, cutting the doctor off. Clarke titled her head and the brunette rolled her eyes. “Really. I don’t need them.”

Lexa would keep the real reason why she didn’t need painkillers to herself. For now, she would let the doctor think she was tough enough without them.

“I guess we’re done here then,” Clarke said hesitantly. Lexa smiled and moved forward, placing her hand on the blonde’s forearm.

“Thank you, Clarke.” The blonde nodded with a slight gulp, and Lexa walked out of the room, smiling to herself and feeling something other than lust for the first time in a long time.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe I should have tagged this as slow burn...
> 
> Things are developing slowly! Let me know your thoughts, and know more is in store :)

Clarke stood by herself in the ICU room minutes after Lexa had left, thinking about the other woman and how utterly confused she was by the brunette. 

She could also still feel where Lexa’s hand had been on her forearm.

Two thoughts crossed the blonde’s mind: one, she liked Lexa but she couldn’t figure out why. _I mean, she’s a biker for God’s sake_ , she thought. She rides around on a motorcycle, which Clarke and her colleagues had dubbed “donorcycles” because when someone gets in a motorcycle accident, they usually don’t survive. The brunette has a ridiculous “job” in which she mysteriously dislocates her shoulder and is the Vice President of a motorcycle club which is essentially just a more eloquent way of calling it a gang.

But Clarke was fascinated by her. Not to mention the large tattoo on her right arm and more tattoos on her back that the blonde could only catch a glimpse of. _But damn_.

Thought number two: _my mother would kill me if she knew I was even thinking about Lexa_.

The blonde took a deep breath and shook her head before returning to the ICU nurses station where she put her long blonde hair into a messy bun and got back to work.  

Before she could even log into the computer, however, she felt her phone vibrating and looked to see who was calling. It was an unknown number, but the blonde decided to answer it anyway.

“Hello?”

“Hey, princess.”

Clarke froze and her heart rate skyrocketed at the sound of the voice on the other end.

“Finn, how did you get this number?” She said quietly, trying not to garner any attention from the nurses.

“I needed to hear your voice, Clarke.” The blonde felt her blood go cold at the sound of the man saying her name as if nothing had ever happened.

“You’re violating the restraining order, Finn. Don’t call again or I’ll call the police.” She promptly ended the call and grabbed onto the counter, trying to steady herself and regain her composure.

“Clarke?” The blonde turned around and saw Lexa looking at her from the doorway to Nyko’s room. “Everything okay?” The blonde swallowed the bile that had collected in the back of her throat and nodded her head, half trying to convince herself that she was okay. “Are you sure because you’re a little pale and while I’m no doctor-”

“Lexa, I’m fine, really,” Clarke responded quickly. Luckily, the blonde’s pager went off, saving her from the brunette’s questioning look. She threw Lexa a quick smile as she walked in the opposite direction towards the information desk where the page had come from.

As she walked closer to where her pager had directed her, she realized there was a sheriff’s deputy standing there, giving her stomach a sinking feeling.

“Dr. Griffin?” The deputy asked, extending his hand as she got closer. “Deputy Emmerson. Is there someplace more private where we can talk briefly?” The blonde nodded hesitantly and brought him into a “quiet” room off of the lobby waiting area, even though it was early enough in the morning for the hospital to be nearly empty.

“What can I do for you, deputy?” She asked after the man closed the door behind him.

“I know you’re busy, doctor so I’ll try not to take up too much of your time. I understand you are one of the physicians on Nyko Kona’s case?” Clarke simply nodded, waiting for the deputy to continue. “Are you aware of his gang affiliation, ma’am?”

“I understand he’s part of The Grounders motorcycle club, sir,” she responded strongly and noticed how the man smiled at her response, clearly his annoyance beginning to bubble. There was something about the deputy that irritated Clarke, but she couldn’t put her finger on it just yet.

“Yes, that is correct, Dr. Griffin. I guess what I’m trying to ask is if you are aware of any of the events that unfolded the evening Mr. Kona was shot.” The blonde narrowed her eyes and tilted her head challengingly before responding.

“All I’m aware of, deputy, is the injuries he sustained that evening due to a gunshot wound to his chest.” Emmerson pursed his lips and placed his hands on his hips, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

“And you’ve heard...nothing from the other members?” Clarke shook her head. “Nothing at all? No murmurs, no talk of what happened or maybe some retaliation?” Clarke laughed quietly and shook her head again.

“No, deputy, I have not heard anything from any of the other members. With all due respect, my job is to make sure Mr. Kona receives the best medical care and attention possible, not to try and spread rumors or eavesdrop on conversations.”

“You do realize this is an active investigation and any information you might be withholding could result in charges being brought against you, correct?” Clarke smiled, as genuinely as she could muster, and stepped forwards towards the man.

“Yes, I do realize that and I’m not withholding anything, deputy. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to return to work.” The man hesitated for a moment before moving out of the blonde’s way, watching her exit back into the waiting area.

 

\-----------------------------------

 

“Jesus, Clarke! A week on the job and you’ve already got drama?” The blonde rolled her eyes as she sat in the on-call room with her phone on speaker as she made her way through a bag of potato chips. 

“Thanks, Raven. Your support means _so_ much,” she said sarcastically.

“Okay, okay, where to start...Finn _called_ you?”

“Yeah and it scared the shit out of me, Raven. I mean, I literally almost vomited after I hung up. How the _fuck_ did he get my number?” Clarke said, crunching on a few chips.

“I don’t know blondie, but that’s terrifying. Have you told your mom?” The blonde let out a huff before responding.

“Raven, you’ve met my mother. Of course I haven’t told her. She’d hire a personal bodyguard to keep me safe at all times.” It was Raven’s turn to laugh as she sighed into the phone.

“Okay, you’ve got a point. But seriously, is there anyone to kinda like, watch your back? We both know Finn has a history of going off the rails.”

Clarke thought about the last manic episode her ex-boyfriend had which almost landed him in prison. She shook the memory from her mind quickly.

“I mean, I’m pretty much ‘in’ with the local biker gang so-”

“You’re _what_?!” The other woman exclaimed before falling into a fit of laughter. “How in God’s name did you manage that?”

“One of them got shot, I saved his life, they’re all grateful, blah blah blah,” she said nonchalantly.

“And mama Griff has most definitely already given you a lecture about that, I’m sure.”

“Oh, did she ever. Mostly about one in particular but, yes. Major lecture.” Clarke grimaced and hoped Raven wouldn’t catch onto her slip up about mentioning 'someone in particular'.

“Someone in particular?” _Not so lucky_. “What does that mean?”

“There might be...a really attractive member from the ga-motorcycle club,” Clarke quickly corrected herself, shoving more potato chips into her mouth before she said anything else she would regret.

“Clarke Griffin...where do I even _begin_ with you?” Raven sighed dramatically before continuing. “Spill the beans, you little shit. Tell me everything.”

“Well, her name’s Lexa. She’s the vice president of the club and she has these green eyes that are just like...mesmerizing. And at first I thought she was like, this huge player but I think she’s actually just a big softie in a biker’s body. Speaking of body, she has this huge tattoo on her arm and some big piece on her back that I couldn’t really get a good look at and-”

“Wait a _fucking_ second,” Raven interrupted, “have you already had sex with her?!”

“ _What_? No!” Clarke yelled defensively.

“ _Why_ have you seen her back and her arm then, Clarke?” Raven yelled, prompting Clarke to turn the volume down on her phone.

“She dislocated her shoulder and I had to set it back in place, you pervert,” the blonde spat jokingly. She heard laughter on the other end of the phone while Clarke felt a blush creeping onto her face.

“My god, Griffin. You’ve got a crush on a biker chick. Ha! So like, are you going to ask her on a date? Do bikers go on dates or do they just have fuck buddies?” Clarke started laughing, then the thought of her being just another notch for Lexa hit her, and she fell silent.

“I...I don’t know, Raven.” Clarke sighed and looked at her empty bag of chips, wishing there were more to help her eat her feelings.

“Just be careful, Clarke. I love you and I want you to be happy, but just _please_ be careful. Everything that happened with Finn...I can’t see you go through that again.”

“I know, Ray. Thank you,” she said with a sigh. “Shit, I better get going but I’ll call you later, okay?”

“Love you, Griff.” Clarke said her goodbyes and hung up, sitting in her chair for another few moments thinking about everything Raven had said. Finn had been an absolute disaster, and the very memory of it all gave Clarke goosebumps.

The blonde didn’t think Lexa was anything like Finn, but the brunette was a gun-wielding biker who had probably killed people. Or at least that’s what Clarke had convinced herself.

The doctor threw away the empty bag of chips and took a deep breath before exiting the on-call room and reminded herself that she only had 14 more hours on her shift before she could go home and finally unpack the boxes and furniture that had arrived from Seattle to her new home in California.

 

\------------

 

Clarke felt like a zombie. 

She was absolutely _exhausted_ from her last shift, which had gone by at a painfully slow pace. The blonde was used to the fast-paced hospital in Seattle where traumas came in almost every couple of hours. Her new job provided her with a trauma once every shift, if she was lucky.

She exited the hospital to a beautifully sunny afternoon, which in turn made her smile despite the exhaustion. She reached her car, a 1967 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme, which had been her father’s pride and joy. She remembered how the older man had barely ever taken the car out of his garage, simply enjoying the way it looked when it was cleaned and waxed. Clarke, however, decided to drive it almost daily to try and hold onto her father’s memory. Other than the green watch which she wore everyday, it was the only item that provided good memories on a daily basis.

“Sweet ride,” she heard from behind her, and she was snapped out of her father’s memory to see the brunette woman who made her heart race like a little schoolgirl.

The blonde smiled as Lexa walked over to her from a newer Ford pickup truck.

“How’s the wing?” Clarke asked playfully, a smile tugging at her lips.

“Hurts,” the brunette replied with a shrug. “Seriously, is that _your_ ride?”

“It was my dad’s,” the blonde replied, watching as Lexa tipped her sunglasses up so she could get a better look at the classic car. Clarke looked over the woman’s face and couldn’t help but think how beautiful she was. “What are you doing back at the hospital? I’m starting to think you spend more time here than I do.”

“Anya and Aiden are coming home today,” Lexa said with a beaming smile. “I’m just helping while Gustus is at work.” The blonde nodded and felt her phone vibrating again, but her jaw clenched when she saw the same number from earlier this morning. She quickly put it back in her pocket, but not before the brunette noticed.

“Are you going to tell me who keeps calling you?” Lexa asked, stepping a little closer to the blonde.

“It’s nothing,” Clarke replied curtly.

“ _Right_. Which is why you looked like you were going to puke this morning and now your jaw is clenched so tight that you can hardly speak.” The blonde simply looked down at her feet, and Lexa took a deep breath. “Clarke, if someone’s bothering you, I can help.”

The blonde looked up and saw something in the green eyes staring back at her, a softness she hadn’t yet seen from the other woman.

“I...it’s an ex of mine. He’s been calling and I’m not really sure how he got my number in the first place. I have a restraining order against him and he’s not supposed to contact me…” Clarke trailed off as she looked down at her feet, trying to keep her tears at bay. She didn’t want to appear weak in front of the other woman, but she felt a hand on her forearm and she looked up at the woman who was considerably closer than before.

“If he calls again, don’t call the police, okay? Just call me,” the brunette said, pulling an old receipt from her pocket before writing down her phone number.

“Lexa-”

“Clarke, I’m _serious_ ,” the brunette replied quickly, cutting the blonde off. She handed the blonde the piece of paper, and Clarke took it, trying her best to smile but feeling slightly embarrassed. “Anytime you need something, just call.” Lexa smiled before backing away slowly. “I need to go get Anya before she tears me apart for being late, but seriously. _Anytime_.”

Clarke nodded and watched the brunette head towards the hospital. She looked down at the piece of paper and put it in her purse for safe-keeping before unlocking the car and sliding into the antique to head to her new home.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy, ladies and gentlemen :) I didn't really plan on updating this every day, but I'm kind of obsessed and I can't be stopped soon....
> 
> Feel free to leave comments!

Lexa could hardly contain her excitement. It wasn’t as if she had never given her number out to a girl before. Hell, the amount of times she had to change her number after girls had gotten too attached was more than she would like to think about.

But Clarke was _different_.

The brunette couldn’t quite figure out _what_ made Clarke different, though. Maybe it was her career-oriented mindset. Maybe it was when she entered the room, she demanded respect and wouldn’t accept anything less. Maybe it was how incredibly beautiful she was, even after a long shift at the hospital. She didn’t have to be wearing a ton of makeup and a low-cut shirt to grab Lexa’s attention.

The blonde was simply, so _Clarke_ , and Lexa liked her.

The biker walked out of the elevator with a smile plastered on her face despite the horrible pain in her bad shoulder. She walked into Anya’s room to find the woman sitting on the edge of her bed, arms folded across her chest as baby Aiden slept in his car-carrier.

“Nice of you to finally show up,” Anya said with an eye roll. “What the hell took you so long, and why the _fuck_ is your arm in a sling?!” She asked with wide eyes, finally seeing her best friend was injured through her angry eyes.

“I’m sorry! I was out in the parking lot talking to Clarke and I may have dislocated my shoulder last night when I was with Gustus,” she said with a sly smile. The older woman squinted her eyes at Lexa before gingerly getting off the bed, prompting Lexa to grab the baby with her good arm.

“Who the hell is Clarke?”

“She’s the surgeon who saved Nyko.” The reply forced Anya to stop in her tracks and look at Lexa with questioning eyes.

“Dr. Clarke Griffin, as in _my_ doctor’s daughter?” Lexa nodded with a knowing grin on her face. “Lexa... _no_. I _know_ that look. What in the actual _fuck_ are you doing?” She practically yelled, and Lexa looked out of the door to make sure no one had heard.

“Weren’t you the one who just _days_ ago told me to go find someone to love and start a family with?”

“I didn’t mean Abby Griffin’s daughter, you fucking idiot!” The younger woman’s smile quickly fell from her face, anger replacing her previous ecstatic state, but Anya wasn’t finished. “If you need a quick fuck or someone to get your rocks off, find someone else.”

“ _Why_ are you so upset right now? Nothing has happened.”

“But you’d like it to?” Anya replied quickly, forcing Lexa to think for a second.

“Yes. I _really_ like her, Anya. She’s different.” The older woman rolled her eyes and sat back down on the edge of the hospital bed.

“You’re right, Lex. She _is_ different. What makes her different is the world she _lives_ in. She lives in a world where she fixes people; she _saves_ them and prevents them from dying. You, on the other hand, live in a completely different world in which you would _kill_ someone if it came down to it.” Lexa was silent as she processed what her best friend was saying. “Lex, I’m only saying this because I don’t want you to get hurt. You and Clarke? It would _never_ work. She’s just...not one of us. What happens when shit goes down and the police go to her for answers? You think she’ll just stay quiet?”

The younger brunette couldn’t even look at Anya. She picked at a stray thread on her sling and thought about what the other woman had just said.

“Are you ready? Gus is going to worry if we aren’t back soon,” Lexa said, changing the subject and looking at the baby sleeping in the carrier.

The two women walked silently through the hospital and out to the parking lot to Lexa’s truck, and didn’t say a word the entire ride back to the auto shop.

 

\------------------

 

The welcome-home party for Anya and Aiden was in full swing later that night in true Grounder fashion: bonfires throughout the auto-yard with plenty of alcohol, girls and horny bikers looking to score.

But Lexa wasn’t feeling it.

Instead, she sat on the roof of the clubhouse, nursing a bottle of Jack Daniels whiskey, her favorite. Anya’s words continued to echo through her head, causing the brunette to continue swigging from the now half-empty bottle.

She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket, and saw a text from an unknown number. She opened the screen and tried not to smile at what she saw.

**In case YOU need anything. Here’s**

**my number.**

**This is Clarke, by the way.**

Against her better judgement (or Anya’s judgement), the brunette tapped out a quick reply and hit “send” before she could think about what she actually said.

**Grounder party for the new mom**

**and baby. Auto shop. Stop by if**

**you want.**

She took another swig and closed her eyes as the liquor burned the back of her throat.

 _She isn’t one of us. What the fuck are you doing? It would never work_.

Anya’s words kept replaying in her mind as if they were on a broken record and Lexa couldn’t turn it off. Part of her knew her best friend was right. They did come from different worlds. But why would Clarke have helped Lexa if she didn’t at least care a little bit? The doctor could have easily told Lexa to go to the ER to get her shoulder fixed. Instead, she had taken care of it herself, definitely breaking some sort of hospital protocol to help a Grounder.

Lexa was ripped from her thoughts after hearing some hollering down below in the yard. Before she could look to see what all the noise was about, she heard Anya’s voice from one of the bonfires.

“You lost, blondie?” The older woman yelled, bringing attention to the doctor who had just walked inside the gates to the auto yard. “Little far from home, dontcha think?”

Lexa looked down to see the beautiful blonde, who looked skeptical about her decision to come to the party.

“Shut up, Anya,” Lexa yelled from the roof, catching the blonde’s attention. The brunette could see a smile tug on the other woman’s lips. “Come on up, Clarke.”

Once the blonde climbed the ladder to the roof, Lexa smiled and patted the area next to where she was sitting and watched as the doctor made her way over. Clarke quirked her brow at the sight of the whiskey bottle and a small laugh escaped her lips.

“First of all, I’m not sure whether I should be impressed or terrified that you managed to make it up that ladder with one working arm,” Clarke said as she took a seat next to the brunette. “Secondly, taking whiskey pulls on a roof with a dislocated shoulder doesn’t seem like the safest idea.”

The brunette shrugged before pulling the bottle to her lips, but looked at Clarke before she drank.

“I like to live dangerously.” The brunette took a swig and noticed how the blonde’s eyes followed her lips. “Plus, whiskey is the best painkiller around.” Lexa handed the bottle to the blonde, and was pleased when she took the bottle from her hands and took a quick pull, hardly grimacing as she swallowed the liquid.

“I can still get you painkillers, Lexa.”

“Don’t need them.”

“The bottle of whiskey makes me beg to differ.” Lexa nodded and pursed her lips before staring off into the distance, taking a deep breath.

“My mother was a heroin addict,” the brunette said, clasping her hands together tightly. “She was in and out of my life until she died of an overdose when I was eight. So, needless to say, I stay away from anything and everything drug related.” The brunette rubbed her hands on her jeans nervously until Clarke placed her right hand on Lexa’s left.

“Lexa, I’m _so_ sorry,” the blonde said, blue eyes meeting green. The brunette was feeling vulnerable, something she definitely wasn’t used to, and changed the subject swiftly to try and avert attention from her too-personal story.

“I’m surprised you actually came here,” Lexa said, grabbing the bottle of whiskey from Clarke’s hand before taking a long swig.

“Well, you invited me so…” the blonde said, drawing out the “o” sound.

“I guess I didn’t think you’d actually show up,” Lexa said with a little too much bite.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

Lexa shrugged, feeling buzzed from the dark liquid.

“We live in two very different worlds, don’t you think?”

“Is that Lexa or Anya speaking?” The brunette was rendered speechless. She hadn’t expected the blonde to be so blunt. Clarke rolled her eyes when Lexa didn’t say anything. “Listen, we _do_ come from different worlds, that’s true. But you know what? I see more than just a biker or the Vice President of the Grounders MC. I see a woman who knows the meaning of loyalty and would do anything for those she cares about. I’ve seen the way you look at Gustus and Anya and that baby...I see right past the hard exterior you work so hard to keep up, Lexa.”

The brunette rubbed the bridge of her nose with her index finger and thumb, trying to figure out what to say.

“I’m not used to... _this_ ,” Lexa said quietly, reaching for the whiskey bottle but Clarke grabbed it before she could reach it.

“Not used to what?”

“ _Feelings_ ,” the brunette said simply before looking up to see Clarke’s blue eyes looking back at her, laced with concern.

“Having feelings doesn’t make you weak, Lexa. _Hiding_ from them is what really makes you weak.”

 _How_ _does_ _she_ _get_ _me_ _so_ _damn_ _well_? Lexa thought, her brain swirling with a mix of booze and these newfound feelings. She looked up to see Clarke looking back at her, a smile tugging on her lips.

“Are you _laughing_ at me?” Lexa asked playfully, a smile of her own starting to creep on her lips. The brunette’s brow furrowed in mock-embarrassment and she looked down at her shoes, only to feel a hand on her chin, forcing her to look up at the blonde’s blue eyes.

Lexa placed her good hand on Clarke’s cheek, and leaned in gently before pressing her lips to the other woman’s. It was soft and tentative, and the brunette was surprised when the blonde leaned in, deepening the kiss and and bringing her hand to rest on Lexa’s bad arm. Both women savored the feeling of their lips finally meeting, and Lexa couldn’t help the smile she felt as she continued to kiss the other woman. She could also feel her heart racing through her chest, and her head felt warm and fuzzy at the feeling of finally capturing Clarke’s lips.

“Come home with me,” Lexa whispered after what seemed like hours of kissing the other woman, resting her forehead against Clarke’s to take a breath.

“Not yet,” the blonde whispered back, smiling as she took Lexa’s face between her hands.

 _Yeah, Clakre Griffin is different_ , Lexa thought as she looked at the beautiful girl, ready to capture her lips once again.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing all too-exciting in this chapter, but something's brewing....just you wait and see!
> 
> As always, leave comments and let me know what you think!

Clarke walked back to the Cutlass a little after 11:00pm despite Lexa’s pleas to stay longer. The blonde had used the excuse of being exhausted from her last shift and the fact that her house wouldn’t unpack itself. 

The real reason, however, was that Clarke knew she wouldn’t be able to stop herself with the brunette if she stayed any longer.

She smiled as she thought back to how soft Lexa’s lips were in contrast to her other facial features; the hard-set jaw that was usually clenched and the piercing green eyes that demanded respect at all times; her sharp cheekbones and the way her hair was usually pulled tightly back in intricate braids. Warmth quickly spread throughout Clarke’s body as she thought about the other woman, only to be interrupted by her phone vibrating in her back pocket.

Five texts and two missed calls from her mother. _Shit_.

“Clarke, _where_ are you?! Are you okay? I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for the last hour!” Her mother yelled as the blonde opened the door to her car and sat down on the fine leather.

“I’m sorry mom. I’ve been out running errands,” she lied, squinting her eyes in hopes that Abby wouldn’t question her.

“Errands? Clarke it’s 11:00 at night!”

“I _know_ , I know but I didn’t have any food in the fridge and I needed stuff for the house,” she lied again, turning the key to start the car’s engine.

“Well, you scared the shit out of me, Clarke. I stopped by and you weren’t there, then you weren’t answering and-”

“Mom! I’m _fine_. Why don’t you come by tomorrow morning and help me unpack, okay?” The blonde heard her mother let out a huff on the other end, clearly defeated.

“Okay. Please get home safely.”

“I promise. Love you, mom,” she said as she put the car in ‘drive’ and sped down the street towards the grocery store. The blonde actually needed food. That part hadn’t been a lie.

 

\---------------------

 

Abby stopped by the next morning, and Clarke immediately began to regret inviting the woman over. She was too chatty, and the blonde was already beginning to get a headache from her mother’s continuous questioning. Everything from work to friends to her love life seemed to be at the forefront of Abby’s mind. 

“What ever happened to that Finn, guy?” Her mother asked, stopping Clarke dead in her tracks as she unwrapped kitchen plates.

“It didn’t work out,” she said simply, hoping her mother would drop the subject.

Apparently that would be too much to ask for.

“He seemed like such a _nice_ guy, Clarke! I don’t understand how you keep throwing these guys away. You’re going to end up all alone,” she joked, but Clarke wasn’t laughing.

“Can you hand me that box over there,” the blonde asked, eyeing her mother with a clenched jaw. Abby seemed to have noticed the change in her daughter’s tone, and a frown took over her face.

“I overheard something interesting yesterday,” the older woman said as she handed her daughter another moving box. Clarke simply quirked an eyebrow, prompting her mother to continue. “Anya and Lexa were talking, loudly I might add, right before she was discharged.”

“Okay…” the blonde said, irritation evident in her voice. Her mother rolled her eyes at her daughter’s response, putting her hands on her hips in defiance.

“Lexa _likes_ you,” she said bluntly. Clarke had to try with all her might to not smile.

“And that upsets you,” the blonde said, turning to look at her mother whose face was slowly becoming a shade of red.

“ _Of course_ it upsets me, Clarke. Don’t play dumb. I told you days ago that she was bad news and here I am, lecturing you once again.”

“And why is that? You think I can’t make my own decisions?”

“That’s not what I’m saying, Clarke.”

The two women stood there, staring at each other for a few moments, trying to figure out what to say.

“There’s more than meets the eye with her,” the blonde finally said quietly, breaking the silent tension in the kitchen. “I know she’s in the club and I’m sure she’s done things that...you or I wouldn’t do, but I don’t think that means she’s a bad person.”

“What makes you so sure?” Abby asked, moving her hands from her hips to be folded across her chest.

“The way she’s looked after Nyko and Anya while they’ve been in the hospital. She’s loyal and will do anything for those two or any of the other members. They’re her family, mom, and while we may not understand it, it’s hard not to admire.”

Abby visibly swallowed, looking uncomfortable for the first time since arriving at her daughter’s apartment. She shifted her weight from foot to foot before she finally spoke. 

“You like her?” The older woman said quietly, seeming nervous about how her daughter might answer.

Clarke paused and thought. She knew her answer, but she didn’t know how to tell her fragile mother.

“As I’ve gotten to know her better, _yes_. I like her,” the blonde responded quietly, moving forward to take her mother’s hands in her own. “I know you don’t like it, and I’m not doing this to spite you. You just...you have to trust me, okay?” The younger Griffin saw her mother’s eyes become somewhat misty, and Abby looked up at the ceiling to tears from falling.

“I...I trust you, Clarke. It’s just,” Abby paused and took a deep breath, gathering the courage to say whatever was on her mind. “If anything ever happened to you, I don’t know what I would do.”

Her mother’s admission was not what the blonde had been expecting. Her breath hitched in her throat, and she was at a loss of what to say.

“Clarke, you’re all I have,” Abby continued, silent tears beginning to fall. “I love you and I want you to be happy, but I can’t even handle the thought of something happening to you. Not after what happened to your father.” Both women now had tears falling down their cheeks, and Clarke smiled at her mother, trying to sooth the woman in front of her.

“I’m going to be careful, mom. You _know_ I have good instincts and I always listen to my gut. Plus, who knows what’s even going on with Lexa and I right now. I’ve only been here for over a week. There’s still a lot to figure out, okay? Just know I’m going to be careful,” she said before kissing her mom on her forehead. Abby responded by wrapping her daughter in a tight hug, holding her for a few moments.

“Alright let’s get this house unpacked,” Abby said, changing the subject quickly while wiping her eyes dry. Clarke could only smile and agree and she moved onto another full box ready to be unpacked.

 

\--------------------

 

Clarke had seen the news by the time her next shift had come around, fully aware of the explosion and subsequent investigation into the mysterious market explosion a couple of nights ago. While the blonde could put the pieces of the puzzle together in her head, she knew better than to ask Lexa if that was indeed the reason the brunette had dislocated her shoulder. Part of Clarke’s mind wanted to know for sure; the other more reasonable side knew ignorance was bliss in this instance. 

So, the blonde went about her shift, waiting for anything and anything to entertain her. Nyko was improving and had been moved from the ICU to another wing, effectively off Clarke’s care and onto another doctor’s service. 

Which meant Clarke had no real reason to see Lexa.

The blonde distracted herself by chatting with her mother in the main lobby of the hospital when she saw Deputy Emmerson stroll in through the front doors. His signature smirk caught the blonde’s eye, and she knew immediately why the man was paying a visit.

“Dr. Griffin, good to see you. May I have a minute, please?” He said all-too nicely, and the blonde excused herself from the conversation with her mother to join the deputy in the quiet room off the waiting area.

“Twice in one week, deputy?” Clarke said as she closed the door and folded her arms across her chest defiantly. The man smiled as he pulled a small notepad from his breast pocket, flipping to a page as he cleared his throat.

“Dr. Griffin, I’m sure you’re aware of the explosion at the Quick Mart off highway 3?”

“Yes, I saw it on the news.”

“We have reason to believe several members of the Grounders MC were behind the attack. I understand you treated Lexa Woods’ shoulder that night, is that correct?” Clarke felt goosebumps collecting on her arms as she thought about how to answer the deputy. 

“Yes sir, that’s correct.” The man smiled, and the blonde could feel her skin crawl at the very sight.

“Why didn’t you send Ms. Woods to the emergency room to be treated?” Clarke squinted her eyes, and tilted her head at the man’s question.

“ _Excuse me_?”

“You treated her off-record in the ICU, is that correct?”

“I _examined_ her shoulder in the ICU,” the blonde said sharply.

“But you treated her?”

“Deputy Emmerson, I cannot discuss the details of a patient’s treatment without their consent. HIPAA laws prevent me from doing that. If you have questions about Ms. Woods’ shoulder, I advise you to speak with her directly.” The smirk from the man’s face faded, and Clarke could see the man’s pupils get darker as he took a step forward.

“Dr. Griffin, I’m not asking for the details of her medical care. I’m wondering why her treatment was never _reported_ ,” he said with a bite to his tone. “You have to understand how that would look to someone in law enforcement, right? Aiding a suspected criminal?” Clarke huffed at the man’s attempted intimidation. “Someone just _magically_ appears with a dislocated shoulder and you don’t think to ask what happened?”

“Deputy, I can guarantee you I was not ‘aiding a criminal’, or whatever it is you think happened. Lexa Woods gave me no reason to believe she had committed any sort of crime that morning. I treated her according to her injury and what she told me caused said specific injury. End of story.”

By the time the blonde was done speaking, Emmerson was a shade of red, darker than when he had begun his discussion with the blonde. He put his hands on his hips, one which rested on the holster of his gun, and took a deep breath before walking towards the door, stopping besides the blonde on his way.

“I _know_ you’re involved, Griffin. I’m going to take you down, just like the rest of those sorry lowlifes.” She turned to look at him, her lips pursed and her jaw clenched. “I’d be careful if I was you.”

Clarke turned to see him walk through the door and past her mother, who had a worried look on her face. The blonde took a deep breath and walked to her mother, preparing to explain in her own words what happened before her mother heard it from anyone else.

“What the hell was _that_ about?” Her mother asked quietly. The blonde closed her eyes and took a deep breath before responding.

“He thinks I know something about the explosion,” she said ambiguously.

“Why would you know anything about that?”

“I...I treated Lexa’s dislocated shoulder that morning, when Nyko woke up and the whole MC came to see him.” The blonde looked at her mother and could see the blood draining from her mother’s face.

“ _Clarke_...please tell me-”

“I don’t know _anything_ , mom. She didn’t tell me anything, okay?” Her mother huffed and shook her head, avoiding Clarke’s eyes.

“This is _exactly_ why I don’t want you getting involved with her. The minute anyone sees you together, they assume you know club business.”

“I’m not an idiot, mom. I know better than to ask questions.”

Clarke debated whether to tell her she treated Lexa’s shoulder off-record, but she kept that to herself - for now.

“Dammit, Clarke. Just...just be careful, okay? _Please_ don’t get caught up in any of that.”

“I know, I know,” the blonde said repeatedly, convincing not only her mother but also herself.

The blonde’s pager went off, giving her an excuse to leave her mother and the all-too-uncomfortable conversation of being involved with Lexa Woods, which Clarke was quickly beginning to understand was a very complex endeavor. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all of the comments! I don't really want to give away any of the plot or future of the story, but I've had a couple of people comment about the fate of Jax/Tara and hoping that Clarke and Lexa won't suffer the same fate. All I'm going to say is this: the Clexa fandom has been through enough with 3x07 and JRoth being the lying POS that he is. So, keep that in mind and know that I stand with the rest of the fandom when we say we deserve so much better, because we do, dammit! 
> 
> Okay, enough rambling. Enjoy the chapter and let me know what you think!

**So, how long do I have to**

**keep this sling on doc?**

Lexa put her phone in her pocket, not really expecting a quick response from the busy doctor as she sat by Nyko’s bed while he slept. The brunette had occupied her free time with the man since she was unable to work at the shop with her bad arm. Not only was she annoyed by the lack of activity, but she could tell Titus was growing tired of her not being able to work.

**Depends...how’s it feeling?**

The brunette saw the text on her phone and smiled. She was typing out a response when she heard the man stirring in his bed. She looked up to see him smirking at her, and she quirked her eyebrow in response.

“Sure are... _smiley_ over there, Lex,” he said as a smile of his own kept tugging at his lips. “Who’s the girl?”

“What makes you think it’s a girl?” The brunette responded somewhat defensively, rolling her eyes in the process.

**Like a million bucks.**

“Well, the way you’re smiling at your damn phone is one indication,” he said, trying to re position himself in bed so he was sitting up more instead of laying down. Lexa got up from her chair to help him, but he shooed her away. “C’mon kid. I’ve known you since you were a baby, and I know that smile on your face. Spill the beans.”

**I’d have to take a look at it.**

Lexa looked down at her phone before thinking about what to say to Nyko. She knew the man loved her, but so far, the club had mixed feelings about the doctor.

“It’s...it’s Dr. Griffin,” the woman said hesitantly, looking at the man closely to gauge his response. He raised his eyebrows and nodded a little bit, looking as though he was trying to figure out what to say.

“I bet that has mixed reviews around the clubhouse, huh?” Lexa laughed slightly, rolling her eyes and nodding.

**Should I find you at the hospital**

**orrrrr….?**

“Anya’s been vocal about it to say the least. I haven’t really told anyone else besides you and her, but I’m sure word’s gotten around. No one’s really said anything,” she said, looking at her hands nervously.

“You’ve got good taste, kid,” he said, bringing Lexa’s attention back up to the man who was smiling genuinely at the woman. “She saved my life and fixed your damn shoulder without saying a word to the hospital, from what I can tell.” Nyko looked Lexa over and grabbed her forearm gently before continuing. “You’re a smart one, Lex. I don’t need to give you some damn lecture about being careful and all that shit. If being in this hospital has taught me anything, it’s that life is short. Do what you want, love who you want to love, and be happy for fuck’s sake, okay?”

Lexa smiled back at the man and squeezed his forearm as well, the club’s signature “handshake”.

“You hungry?” The brunette asked, looking at the clock to see it was almost 7:00pm.

“Nah, I’m on this shitty hospital diet. But you go ahead and get some food. I’m not going anywhere,” the man joked and Lexa smiled as she left the room and pulled her phone out of her pocket.

**Can I stop by after my shift?**

**I wouldn’t mind a house call.**

The brunette would never admit it, but her stomach did a flip at the very thought of the blonde coming to her house. She walked through the main lobby of the hospital and out of the front doors to a chilly California evening before jumping into her truck.

**Even if it’s 7 in the morning?**

**I’ll have breakfast ready.**

Lexa smiled as she started the engine and texted her address to the blonde, cranking her music in the process as she drove out of the hospital parking lot with a smile plastered to her face.

 

\----------------------

 

The brunette swiped her phone as her alarm went off at 6:30 the next morning. She let out a huff and rubbed her eyes, moving to sit on the edge of the bed as she stretched her arms over her head, a yawn escaping her lips in the process. Lexa wasn’t normally a morning person, choosing to stay up late as an alternative, but she could certainly rouse herself from bed at an ungodly hour for the beautiful doctor.

After washing her face and throwing a pair of joggers on, she walked out to her kitchen to start a pot of coffee. The brunette opened the fridge, grabbing a multitude of fruits and eggs she had purchased the night before on her way home from the hospital. Lexa was also not a “breakfast” type of person, or really a good cook at all, but she had told the blonde she would have breakfast ready, and dammit if she didn’t stay true to her word.

A little after 7:00, the brunette heard a soft knock on the door, and when she opened it to find the doctor there, she could have sworn her heart stopped for a moment as the sun was rising and cast an incredible light on the beautiful blonde standing in front of her.

“Good morning, Clarke,” the brunette said, opening the door further to allow the blonde to enter. The doctor smiled tiredly at the other woman, and even though she looked like she hadn’t slept all night, Lexa still thought she looked stunning.

The pair walked into the biker’s kitchen, and Clarke stopped when she saw breakfast laid out neatly on the breakfast bar in front of her. Scrambled eggs, a bowl of chopped fruit, and toasted bagels with two different kinds of cream cheese awaited the blonde.

“You weren’t kidding about breakfast,” Clarke said quietly, a smile on her face as she looked at Lexa.

“I figured you’d be hungry after a long shift,” the brunette said with a shrug and a smile as she grabbed 2 mugs from the cupboard and turned back to the blonde. “Coffee?”  

Clarke simply nodded her head, and Lexa couldn’t help but think of how simple and natural this all felt; having Clarke come home from a long shift to Lexa cooking breakfast and making coffee while the blonde told her how the shift had gone. The thought brought a smile to the brunette’s lips as she set the mug in front of Clarke, sliding the cream and sugar in front of her. The blonde fixed her coffee to her liking, took a long gulp, then got out of her seat to move around the island, leaning her back against the counter next to Lexa.

“So, tell me about the shoulder. And don’t lie to me either. If it’s been bothering you at all, I need to know,” the blonde said with an eyebrow quirked. Lexa rolled her eyes playfully before taking the sling off and rolling her shoulder a few times.

“Pain free, doctor, I _swear_ ,” the brunette said, drawing out the “r” sound to make her point. Clarke smiled and stood up to start palpating Lexa’s shoulder, causing the biker to nearly jump at the contact of the blonde’s hands on her skin.

“Sorry, my hands are probably cold,” Clarke said, looking into Lexa’s eyes. The brunette could feel her heart rate increase and her skin felt like it was burning where the blonde was massaging her shoulder.

“No, it’s fine,” she replied quietly, closing her eyes and telling herself to calm the fuck down.

“No pain?” Clarke said as she shifted to start moving the woman’s arm in different motions and directions. All the brunette could do was shake her head and she continued to try and slow her heart rate down.

After several movements and tests, the blonde smiled and rubbed Lexa’s shoulder before moving back to her seat at the breakfast bar.

“In my professional opinion, you can ditch the sling. Your movement is pretty good, and unless you’re really good at hiding pain, there didn’t seem to be any lingering effects,” she said before taking another sip of coffee. Lexa couldn’t help but smile as she watched the doctor and rubbed at her shoulder, keeping the burning sensation there for as long as possible.

“Thank you, Clarke,” Lexa said, adding cream and sugar to her own coffee before taking a long sip.

“Just, maybe keep the ‘club business’ to a minimum in the next week so it doesn’t dislocate again, alright?” Lexa rolled her eyes as she started putting eggs and fruit onto her plate.

“Can’t make any guarantees, doc. Business is business.” The brunette watched the blonde’s reaction and noticed the other woman’s lip purse as she seemed to distract herself with putting fruit on her plate.

“ _Speaking_ of business,” Clarke said suddenly, forcing Lexa to stop eating and give the blonde her full attention. “Deputy Emmerson paid me a visit at work yesterday.”

“What’d he want?” Lexa asked quickly, hardly giving the blonde a chance to finish her sentence. Clarke looked at the biker and put her fork down before she answered.

“He wanted to know why I treated your shoulder.”

Lexa looked at the blonde with a blank expression, waiting for the blonde to continue.

“He wanted to know why I treated you off record. Or, as he put it, why I ‘aided a suspected criminal’,” Clarke said, using her fingers to form air-quotations. The brunette took a deep breath and clenched her jaw, calculating how to handle the situation.

“And what did you _tell_ him?” She asked with a little too much bite. Clarke kept eye contact with the brunette and huffed before folding her arms across her chest defensively.

“I didn’t tell him anything, Lexa. How stupid do you think I am?”

The brunette felt a pang in her chest with Clarke’s words, and she internally chastised herself for being such an ass.

“Clarke, I’m sorry. I know you’re not stupid it’s just...I hardly _know_ you. I don’t think you’d talk to the cops but-”

“But _what_ , Lexa?” The hurt and anger evident in the blonde’s striking blue eyes almost broke Lexa, and she had to take a deep breath before she could continue, but Clarke wasn’t finished. “I treated your shoulder off-record, Lexa and you want to know why? Because I knew you weren’t a klutz like you claimed to be. I figured something had happened, something that would only get you into trouble if I took you to the ER and made you go through that whole process. So I broke a number of different rules so the police wouldn’t have to question you.”

“Clarke, I-”

“ _No_ , Lexa I’m not finished.” The brunette could only lick her lips in nervousness as the blonde got out of her seat and stepped so she was right in front of the biker. “I’m not stupid, okay? I know what I’m getting myself into. Emmerson can threaten me all he wants but-”

“He _threatened_ you?” Lexa said, cutting the blonde off.

“He...yes. When I didn’t give him any information, he told me he ‘knew I was involved’ and told me he’d ‘be careful if I was you’.”

Lexa felt her body warm with a new-found rage, and she clenched her jaw tightly and balled her fists. She closed her eyes as she thought about what to do next, and opened them suddenly when she felt warm hands on both of her arms. She saw compassion take place in the blue eyes staring back at her, and the brunette took a deep breath.

“I’m going to take care of this, Clarke,” she said, grabbing the blonde’s hands in her own. “Emmerson’s whole agenda is to take the Grounders down. He’s been trying ever since he became a deputy and won’t stop until he’s successful.” Lexa saw the blonde’s eyes focus on hers, and the brunette replaced her scowl with a soft smile. “I’ll take care of this, okay?” The blonde nodded and Lexa gave her hands a light squeeze.

The pair finished breakfast in near silence as Lexa thought about how to handle her growing Emmerson problem.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is also from Lexa's POV. I just felt like there was more opportunity to continue the story with her versus Clarke this chapter, so I hope that isn't confusing!
> 
> These next couple of chapters will most likely become fairly violent....so enjoy this while it lasts!
> 
> Feel free to let me know what you think :)

Once Clarke had left and Lexa had gotten dressed, she opened the garage and hopped on her all-black Triumph motorcycle for the first time since the brunette dislocated her shoulder. She almost let an audible moan escape her lips at the feeling of the revving the bike’s engine and ripping out of the garage and down the street. The brunette felt the wind in her hair, and a smile was plastered on her face as she drove through town.

The smile faltered,however, as she entered the auto yard and saw Sheriff Dante Wallace talking with Titus. Even though Wallace was an old friend of the club’s, Lexa felt an uneasy feeling develop in her gut.

“‘Bout time you show up,” Titus said to the younger woman as she dismounted her bike and made her way over to the older men.

“Had to visit the doc about my shoulder,” she said coolly, nodding at Wallace to acknowledge his presence. Titus raised his eyebrows and Lexa shot him a look to tell him not to say anything. “What’s the visit about, Sheriff?”

“The explosion off of highway 3,” he said as he adjusted his police belt, looking nervous as Titus looked on, a heavy tension filling the air.

“You think we had something to do with that?” Lexa asked and Wallace tilted his head knowingly.

“Don’t play dumb, Lexa. You know I’m here to give you all a head’s up. Emmerson is on a tear these days, so just be _smart_ , alright?”

“Speaking of Emmerson,” Lexa replied quickly, catching the attention of both men before she continued. “He apparently threatened Dr Griffin yesterday while she was on shift.”

“The doctor who treated Nyko? Why would he threaten her?” Wallace asked. Lexa shifted her feet nervously before she answered the man.

“She...treated my dislocated shoulder...off-record. He thinks she knows something, which she doesnt-”

“ _Jesus_ _Christ_ ,” Wallace said with a huff. The sheriff looked at Titus and put his hands up. “You’ve got doctors working for you know?”

“She’s not working with anyone, Wallace,” Lexa said with an eye roll, folding her arms across her chest in the process. “She treated my shoulder and that’s the end of it, so if you can tell Emmerson to get fucked and stop bothering her, that would be _great_ ,” the brunette spat, causing both men to look at her questioningly.

“I’ll talk to him, alright?” When the brunette nodded ever-so-slightly, the sheriff started walking back to his squad car, shaking his head, as the pair of bikers looked on.

“You like this doctor, don’t you?” Titus said, keeping his attention on the sheriff as he drove out of the auto yard.

“She saved Nyko and fixed my shoulder,” she said with a blank expression on her face. The last person the brunette wanted to talk to in regards to her personal life was Titus.

“You _know_ what I meant, Lexa,” the man said sternly.

“Don’t worry about it, Titus,” she said with enough bite to cause the man’s jaw to clench.

“I _have_ to worry about it and you know it,” he said, looking at the younger woman for the first time. “Anybody who’s involved with a member of this club is a liability, Lexa. Not just for our own safety but for theirs too. Of all people, I would expect _you_ to understand that the most.”

Lexa balled her fists and closed her eyes briefly. She knew the man was right, but the horrific memories of what happened to Costia, her last long-term relationship and former love, was enough to make the brunette sick to her stomach.

“I understand,” she said quietly, trying to keep her emotions in check. “I can promise you she’s not a liability to us. She didn’t give anything to Emmerson when he pressed her yesterday.” Lexa turned to look Titus in the eyes before continuing. “We can trust her.”

The older man nodded before walking back to the administrative office of the auto shop, leaving Lexa to collect her thoughts before she pulled out her phone to see a text from someone she least expected.

**We need to meet. Diner off**

**Exit 13. 3:00pm. It’s**

**Important.**

Lexa took a deep breath and walked toward the clubhouse in search of Gustus before firing a simple response on her phone.

**Better be important.**

 

\-----------------------

 

Right at 3:00, Lexa and Gustus arrived at the small diner to find the two Azgeda members already waiting for them.

“You sure about this, Lex?” Gustus asked as they put their helmets on the handlebars of their respective bikes. The woman only nodded as she walked forward towards the other man, confidence oozing from every pore.

“This better be worth it, Roan,” she said as she reached the rival club members. Roan, the VP of the Azgeda MC, only smiled and Lexa couldn’t help but notice the scar that ran down the entire right side of his face.

“Good to see you too, Lexa,” he said with his eyebrows raised. He folded his arms across his chest before he continued, looking past the brunette to the tall bearded man behind her. “I’ve got some information that might be of interest to you and your...new _flame_ ,” he said, looking back at the woman in front of him.

Lexa could feel the hair on her arms stand up, and a chill ran down her entire back. She clenched her jaw and balled her fists before taking a step forward, leaving practically no room between her body and Roan’s.

“What could you _possibly_ know about her?” She replied, not wasting her time to see if he was talking about Clarke. The brunette may have hated The Azgeda, but she knew Roan was smart and calculated, unlike his ruthless mother that ran the club.

“You’re aware her father was Jake Griffin, correct?” Lexa looked at him with a blank expression, prompting the man to continue. “The journalist who died in a car accident a few months back? In the canyons?” Lexa had to resist the urge to gulp - Clarke had never mentioned her father, and she had never put two and two together.

“Get to the point, Roan. I don’t have all day,” she spat, never breaking eye contact.

“It wasn’t an accident, Lexa,” he said, causing the brunette to take a step back. “He was run off the road intentionally.”

“By _who_?” She replied quickly as an uncomfortable feeling starting brewing in the pit of her stomach.

“A few of our guys,” the man said quickly and Lexa almost lunged forward before he put his hands up defensively. “Lexa, listen to me before you do anything.” The woman kept her fists at her side and waited for the man to continue. “I didn’t know about it until recently, okay? My mother kept it a secret from me and most of the MC.”

“ _Why_ was he run off the road, Roan?” The brunette replied through clenched teeth, clearly losing her patience and on the brink of losing her restraint and self control.

“He knew about the drugs and the sheriff’s involvement, or lack-thereof. He was going to go public with the information, which would have had not only the ATF in our backyards, but a complete state review of the sheriff’s department.”

“Who from the sheriff’s department has been working with you?” She asked, already knowing his response.

“Emmerson,” he replied quickly and Lexa nodded. _Of_ _course_ _it_ _was_ _fucking_ _Emmerson_ , she thought. _No_ _wonder_ _he’s_ _threatening_ _Clarke_. “You guys have Wallace, we have Emmerson.”

“What exactly was Emmerson’s involvement with the actual accident?” She asked, continuing to attempt to keep her cool. Roan took a deep breath before he continued, looking more and more uncomfortable.

“I don’t know all of the details, Lexa. I swear.” The brunette eyed him closely, gauging the man’s honesty before she continued.

“What do you propose we do about this?” She asked forcefully.

“That’s up to you,” he said, and Lexa could tell the man was being sincere. “She’s _your_ girl. This is _your_ call, Lexa.” The woman nodded and looked back at Gustus, whose jaw was also clenched and looked as though he could combust at any moment. She thanked Roan before turning to walk back to her bike, contemplating her next move.

“Do I tell her?” She asked Gustus, and the man looked back at her with his signature stoic expression.

“Should you talk to Titus first?” He asked, and Lexa closed her eyes. _Probably_ , she thought to herself, but a horrific thought entered her mind.

‘You don’t think he knew anything about this, do you?” She asked Gustus, and saw the realization hit him like a ton of bricks. “Roan mentioned the ATF...if that story was leaked and the ATF did indeed come to town, we would be on lockdown with the guns and they would surely do an investigation into all MCs,” she said, running the scenario through her head. “Gustus, what if Titus knew about this?”

The very thought hit the brunette like a semi truck, a sick feeling taking over her entire body. In the short amount of time she had known Clarke, she had come to care about her. While she knew her own club had done similar things to people in the past, this was different. This was personal to the brunette and the blonde who had managed to captured her full attention. 

She hopped on her bike and sped away towards town, contemplating her next move.

 

\------------------

 

_You've got hell to pay, but you already sold your soul  
It's blasphemy _

Lexa hit the punching bags with right and left hooks, ignoring the pain that was searing into her bad shoulder. Sweat was dripping down her face as she listened to the lyrics of the song from her workout playlist, trying her best to ignore the thoughts going round and round in her head.

_Ask no questions and you'll get no lies  
Turn the cheek and blind the eye (Let it go) _

The brunette thought about Costia, her last girlfriend, and the terrible death the woman had suffered at the hands of the Azgeda. Lexa remembered how her girlfriend had gone missing and the chaos that ensued in the effort try and find her. The images of her girlfriend, shot to death and left for dead on the side of an abandoned road, would continue to haunt Lexa even years after everything had happened. 

_It makes no sense but it must be right_   
_The blood and sweat you sacrificed_   
_Was it all for nothing?_

Her thoughts turned to Clarke, and the thought of someone trying to hurt the blonde or her family. Lexa punched the bag feverishly at the very idea, grunting through the pain she felt innot only her shoulder, but her arms and legs as well. She moved around the bag, pretending it was a rival club member, and hit the bag with enough force and velocity to do some damage. She imaged Nia, The Azgeda's president, as the bag and continued to pound and wail on the heavy leather, reminding herself to breathe. 

_Cause we've found no sign and we've seen no light_   
_We hear no voice when we pray at night_   
_But we swore and now it's too late to turn back._

Lexa thought about what she needed to do next, whether it was to tell Clarke the truth about her father's death or to confront Titus to see if he knew about the intentional killing. Her mind was extremely conflicted, so the brunette continued to do what she knew best: punch the bag and try to ignore her thoughts. 

"What the hell are you doing, Lexa?!" The brunette whipped around to see the blonde standing at the entrance of her garage, a stunned and annoyed look on her face. "Did I not tell you literally _just_ this morning to try and not be an idiot?" She said with enough bite to leave Lexa speechless. The blonde moved forward and looked into the brunette's green eyes, searching for an answer. "Seriously, Lexa I don't mind patching you up every now and then but this is a little ridiculous."

"I...I'm sorry. I had a shitty day and had to blow off some steam and this was the only thing I could think of." The brunette turned the music off and only then did she notice how badly her shoulder was beginning to throb. 

"Need to talk about it?" Clarke asked, her voice softening as she moved to touch the brunette's arm. Lexa moved away from her touch, however, walking across the garage instead to grab a towel and wipe her face off. "Lexa, you can talk to me," the blonde said, causing the biker to only shake her head. 

"Nope. I'm good," she lied in response, and watched as concern was replaced with anger in the blonde's blue eyes. 

' _Right_...you expect me to believe that bullshit?"

"Believe it or not, Clarke, I don't care. I can't just tell you everything that happens, okay? The things I know, the things I've _seen_ and _done_ would make you run for the hills faster than you think." 

"You think I can't handle this shit, is that what this is?" the blonde asked defiantly, moving closer to Lexa. " _You_ don't know what _I've_ been through; you don't know what _I've_ seen and what _I've_ done."

"Have you seen your girlfriend's mutilated body laying on the side of the road?" Lexa screamed, surprising not only herself, but the blonde as well. 

"Lexa-"

"There's a reason I'm not involving you in this, Clarke." Lexa wiped her face, pretending the tears welling up was simply sweat. "Love is weakness," she said as though it was common knowledge.

The blonde took a step back, never taking her eyes away from the woman in front of her. 

"Are you saying you don't want to do this?"

"I care about you, Clarke. It's just...it's not safe for you. I'm sorry."

The blonde bit her lip and nodded, backing away in the process until she turned her back on the brunette and got into her car, speeding away down the street once she started the engine. Lexa felt defeated, knowing she resorted to her old defense mechanisms to try and ignore her feelings for Clarke, but she knew it was for the best while she figured out how to deal with Roan's information. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song mentioned in the last part of this chapter is "Blasphemy" by Bring Me The Horizon 
> 
> (it's a great song and I immediately thought of this fic when I heard it)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know your thoughts! Things are gonna get a little crazy after this...

Clarke gripped the steering wheel tightly, revealing white knuckles as she drove angrily through the streets. Her mind was running a mile a minute, wondering why Lexa had such a change of heart. ‘ _Love is weakness_ ’ the brunette had said. Clarke scoffed at the very thought, wondering how someone could be so jaded. 

As the blonde pulled up to her house and put the car in park, she took a deep breath and tried calm herself down. Clarke could take rejection; that wasn’t her issue or why she found herself to be so worked up over the brunette. What angered her the most was the apparent withholding of information from the other woman. The doctor heard the biker’s words, but those green eyes told a different story. In the short time Clarke had known Lexa, she discovered that the piercing green eyes were the true window into the woman’s emotions, and her eyes had said more than ‘Love is weakness’. 

The blonde got out of her car and walked into the dark house, turning on the lights and making her way to the kitchen where her laptop sat on the counter. She looked at it briefly before going to the refrigerator, still consumed with her own thoughts and unable to focus. 

_ ‘ _ _Have you seen your girlfriend's mutilated body laying on the side of the road?!’_

The brunette’s words reverberated in her head, and before she knew it, Clarke found herself opening her laptop and navigating to google, doing her own investigation. 

What she found horrified her. 

Costia was only 24 years old when she was shot repeatedly throughout her entire body and left for dead on the side of highway 12, 3 miles out of town, Clarke read. The news article stated that the dead woman had been associated with The Grounders, and while the police department and sheriff’s department had suspected that The Azgeda was responsible for the brutal murder, no arrests were ever made due to a lack of evidence. Photos showed a younger Lexa, her jaw clenched with her eyes closed while tears seemed to be falling down her cheeks. 

The blonde swallowed hard as she shut her laptop, a familiar feeling of loss consuming her. While her father’s death was nothing like Costia’s, she knew what it felt like to lose someone so close to you; to lose them too soon without saying a proper goodbye; the feeling of having someone ripped from your life and knowing you would never see them again. 

Clarke now understood why Lexa had told her it wasn’t safe to be with the brunette. The other woman was only looking out for her, it seemed, but the blonde couldn’t help but feel disappointed, knowing the pair had some sort of undeniable connection. 

Her phone’s vibrations pulled the blonde’s attention from the other woman, and her stomach dropped when she saw Finn’s number on the screen. She denied the call, suddenly feeling sick, and dialed her mother’s number instead. 

“Clarke, what a nice surprise,” her mother said, answering her daughter’s call. 

“Hey, is it okay if I stay with you tonight?” There was a pause on the other end, and the blonde could imagine the confusion on her mother’s face. 

“Is everything okay?” Her mother asked, sounding skeptical. 

“Yeah, of course I just...I’m not used to living by myself yet and I haven’t seen you in a few days so-”

“Yes, Clarke, of course you can stay here tonight,” her mother replied with a slight laugh. The blonde hung up with her mother and packed a quick overnight bag, moving as fast as she could to get to Abby’s house and not be alone.

 

\-------------------

 

The blonde decided to pick up an extra shift the next day, not willing to admit to being afraid of being alone. However, the thought of being by herself in her own home or having to spend the entire day with her mother was enough to convince Clarke that working was her best option. 

Luckily for her, the hospital was fairly busy, keeping her mind occupied with patients and trauma. Within the first couple of hours, she had a trauma activation for a climber who fell 100 feet in a nearby canyon, suffering multiple vertebral fractures in the process. The injury was something Clarke wasn’t particularly used to treating, not even in her time in Seattle, and she welcomed the rush of adrenaline that accompanied an exciting case. 

Hours later, she had been asked to consult on a rattlesnake bite a hiker had suffered, even though it wasn’t necessarily a trauma. The case was another first for the blonde, and the chance to see the bite first hand and put her medical mind to use on an interesting case was exhilarating for Clarke. While her morning had certainly been exhausting, the doctor couldn’t help the smile plastered to her face as she made her way to the physician’s lounge to finally get something to eat. 

“Ahh, Dr. Griffin! I’ve heard you had _quite_ the exciting morning.”

“Dr. Jaha, nice to see you,” Clarke responded with a smile. Wells Jaha was a cardiothoracic surgeon at the hospital who had worked closely with the blonde during her first couple of weeks, especially with the gunshot wound Nyko had suffered. 

“I’m sure it’s nothing quite like Seattle, though,” the man responded, stirring his food before taking a bite. 

“Not quite, but it has its fair share of excitement,” the blonde said with a smile before opening the refrigerator to grab her leftovers. “How is Mr. Kona progressing?”

“Really well. He’s actually being discharged today,” Wells responded, a smile beaming on his face. “He asked about you, in fact. He wants you to stop by before he leaves.” Clarke’s smile faltered, knowing Lexa would certainly be in the hospital to help see Nyko home. She grabbed her food and walked over to the microwave, thinking about how she could possibly get out of seeing the man, but her thoughts were interrupted by the other doctor. 

“Don’t worry, Clarke. It’s not a breach or breaking any rules. I think he just wants to say ‘thank you’.” The blonde looked over at him and did her best to smile. “We can go after lunch, if you want?” He asked carefully, sensing the woman’s hesitation. 

“Sure, that would be great,” she lied as she felt dread creep over her. 

 

\-----------------

 

Almost an hour later, the two doctors was through the halls of the hospital on their way to Nyko’s room. The entire walk, Clarke prayed her pager would go off, excusing her from seeing the woman who has brushed her off less than 24 hours ago.

Unfortunately for the blonde, her pager stayed silent and she arrived at Nyko’s room to find the man sitting in a chair, waiting for his discharge papers to be finalized. Clarke could see a number of different people in his room and just outside, and she felt her heart stop at the sight of the brunette woman. She was hard to miss with her hair done in intricate braids, her ripped black skinny jeans, black boots and the cutoff shirt that revealed her toned arms and tribal tattoo. The doctor gulped at the sight and would have done anything in that moment to be able to run in the opposite direction. 

“Dr. Griffin!” Nyko yelled, getting up from his chair as fast as possible despite his obvious weakness. Clarke did her best to smile, and couldn’t help but steal a glance from Lexa. 

“I’m glad to see you’re finally going home,” the blonde said as the man wrapped his arms around her in a tight bear hug. “And I mean that in the nicest way possible,” she joked, feeling the man laugh against her. 

“I can’t thank you enough,” he said, releasing his grip. “You and Jaha saved my life. I’m not really sure how I could ever thank you enough,” the bearded man said, and Clarke could see tears beginning to form in his eyes. 

“You can thank us by not ending up here again,” she said with a coy smile. The biker rolled his eyes playfully, and once again wrapped his arms around Clarke. 

“Be patient with her,” he whispered in the blonde’s ear, and she felt her body stiffen. “She’s been through a lot,” he continued as he drew back to look directly into the blue eyes. Clarke pursed her lips and shot a quick glance to the woman just behind him before looking back to the burly man in front of her. All she could do was nod and step aside so Wells could shake Nyko’s hand. She felt her phone ringing in her pocket, and her heart dropped when she saw the same number from the night before. The blonde could practically feel the blood draining from her face as she took a step towards the hallway, looking for an escape. 

“I have to go, Nyko, but good luck with the rest of your recovery,” she said quickly with a shaky breath before turning and walking quickly down the hall. She could feel her hands shaking and her ears starting to ring as she shot through a set of double doors. Her vision was becoming spotty, and the blonde knew she was on the verge of a full-fledged panic attack as she leaned on the railing attached to the wall for support until she felt a hand on her shoulder. 

“Clarke,” the familiar voice said. “Clarke, are you okay?” The blonde turned her head to see Lexa gripping to her, a look of terror on her face. “Just breathe, take some deep breaths,” she coaxed, keeping one hand on the doctor’s shoulder while the other hand rubbed the woman’s back. 

After a few minutes, Clarke’s heart rate seemed to normalize, the ringing in her ears subsided and her vision was becoming normal again. Embarrassment flooded her system, and she wanted nothing more than to disappear from the woman who was still comforting her. 

“I’m sorry,” the blonde said, looking at the floor, unable to look Lexa in the eye. 

“It was him calling, wasn’t it,” the brunette said quietly, not questioning the blonde but knowing instead. All Clarke could do was nod. “Clarke-”

“It’s _fine_ , Lexa,” the doctor said, interrupting the brunette as she finally lifted her eyes to meet the piercing green ones looking back at her. “I’ll talk with the police and they’ll get it all sorted out. Hell, maybe I can get on Emmerson’s good side by asking for help,” the blonde said jokingly, but she noticed the change in emotions in the brunette’s eyes. 

“You can’t do that,” Lexa said sternly, catching the blonde’s attention.  

“And why not?” Clarke responded defiantly. 

“You just...you can’t.” 

The blonde scoffed and folded her arms across her chest. 

“What is it, Lexa? I’m really trying to understand what’s happened in the last 24 hours with you, but I’m coming up empty.” Clarke watched as the brunette pursed her lips and searched for something to say. 

“I can’t tell you,” the biker responded with a sigh and the blonde felt her blood start to boil. 

“If you can’t tell me, then you can’t help me.”

“Clarke, you have to trust me-”

“ _Trust you_?!” The blonde yelled back, feeling tears well behind her eyes out of frustration. “ _This_ , coming from the person who makes me breakfast in the morning and yells at me the same night, telling me I’m ‘not safe’ with you?” Clarke noticed the hurt in Lexa’s eyes, but she couldn’t help her bubbling emotions. 

When it was clear the brunette was speechless, the blonde rolled her eyes and walked down the hallway, leaving Lexa to stand there. Clarke had had enough, and she needed to work in order to get the other woman off her mind. 

 

\------------------

 

The next evening, Clarke walked out to her car, mentally and physically exhausted from her shift. The medicine and patients had kept her busy, but thoughts of Lexa kept her mind even busier. The blonde hated how much time and energy she was putting into the other woman, but she couldn’t help herself and wonder what the brunette was hiding from her. 

The drive home was fairly short, and Clarke decided to stay at her own place tonight, knowing her mother was on shift, meaning she would be alone regardless. She figured she could grab a bottle of wine and curl up on her own couch, catching up on her favorite shows in attempt to forget about a certain biker.

She padded through the house, turning on lights as she went and made it to her bedroom, throwing her jacket onto the bed. She opened her closet, looking for her favorite hoodie and took off her scrub top, turning to throw it in her dirty-clothes hamper when she noticed a figure in the doorway. 

“There’s my princess,” Finn said, walking closer to Clarke. “I’ve been trying to call you but my you haven’t answered.”

The blonde almost passed out, freezing in place and she tried to figure out what to do. 

“Finn...what are you doing here?” She asked, trying to hide her terror and keep calm. 

“I _found_ you,” he said, tilting his head with a sad smile. The blonde tried to scream, but the man grabbed her, putting his other hand over her mouth to muffle the sound. “Shh, princess. I’m here. I found you. _I found you_.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ******TRIGGER WARNING******
> 
> This chapter is based off of the Sons of Anarchy episode 1x08. 
> 
> This chapter contains some serious violence, including domestic violence and attempted sexual assault. Please proceed with caution, and if you are a victim of any of the mentioned scenarios, please know that you are loved and there are resources to help if you are struggling. 
> 
> With that being said, this is obviously a very emotional and heavy chapter. A lot happens, it's long and might be hard to read in some areas. It is not meant to induce any sort of trauma to any of you, but simply following story lines from SOA and the 100. 
> 
> Please let me know what you think!!!!

Lexa had been trying to call Clarke for over a day, and had only gotten radio silence in return. Frustrated and bored out of her mind, Lexa headed to the auto shop office where she knew Anya would be finishing up paperwork from the day’s business. The brunette walked into the small room and folded her arms across her chest as the older woman eyed her carefully.

“Need something?” Anya asked, her voice laced with exhaustion.

“I need to use your Facebook,” the brunette said, and Anya shot her a look of confusion and annoyance while continuing to swing lightly in her chair, trying to lull the infant to sleep. 

“What the fuck _for_?” The older woman snapped back. Lexa closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying not to take the comment too personally. She knew the older woman wasn’t sleeping well with the new baby, and Lexa tried to tread lightly. 

“It’s Clarke. Her ex has been calling non-stop and I want more information on him,” she said honestly, not wasting any time. 

“Sounds like a problem Clarke can handle, don’t you think?”

“She has a restraining order against him, Anya. This is serious.” 

Anya looked her over, then back at the computer before getting out of her chair slowly, watching as her place was quickly taken over by the younger woman. Lexa quickly navigated to Facebook, and searched Clarke’s name, finding her amongst a number of other women with the same name. She clicked on her profile and immediately went to her pictures, clicking on any that had a male in them. She came across a few pictures that had the same guy, and when Lexa hovered over the man’s face, it read ‘Finn Collins’. She clicked, and her stomach dropped when she saw his occupation listed on his page. 

_ ‘Infantry Specialist at Fort Lewis Army Base’. _

She gulped and lept out of the chair, leaving Anya completely speechless and confused as she bolted out of the office, pulling her cell phone out in the process. 

“Lincoln, do you still have that friend up at Fort Lewis?” She asked as soon as the man answered his phone. 

“Yeah, why? Is everything okay?”

“I need you to call him and ask about an Infantry Specialist named Finn Collins. It’s urgent.” 

“Alright I’ll get back with you.”

Lexa ended the call and took a deep breath. She paced out in the auto yard, running through scenarios in her head. 

What if this guy is armed? What if he’s trying to get to Clarke in person? What if she’s in danger?

No more than two minutes went by before Lincoln was calling her back. 

“What’d you find out?” She heard a sigh on the other end of the phone, knowing that Lincoln only sighed before giving bad news. 

“Apparently Finn Collins has been missing for the last four days,” he said with a worried tone and Lexa’s heart rate increased. “My guy knows him personally and said he’s been dealing with a lot of PTSD issues after coming back from Iraq.” Lincoln paused again and sighed before continuing. “Lexa, he’s AWOL.”

“ _Fuck_!” She said into the phone quietly, trying not to gather any extra attention from the other members. 

“Lexa, what’s going on?” The man on the phone asked, his voice laced with genuine concern. 

“Finn is Clarke’s ex and he’s been calling her nonstop even though she has a restraining order on him.”

“Fuck...she didn’t go to the police, did she?”

“No, I told her not to but we got into it yesterday at the hospital when she joked about telling Emmerson in order to get on his good side.” There was a pause and neither person spoke, knowing the gravity of the situation. “Lincoln I need another favor.”

“Anything,” he responded quickly. 

“I need you to track Clarke’s phone. I...I have a really bad feeling about this guy and she hasn’t answered any of my calls or texts,” she said and the man on the other end of the call could tell there was a certain amount of fear in the brunette’s voice, which was something he rarely heard. 

“Okay hang on a second,” he said after the woman gave him Clarke’s number, and Lexa could hear the keys tapping in the background as Lincoln worked. She reminded herself to breathe and to try and calm herself down, but thoughts of the blonde woman and the possibility of her being in danger was too overpowering. “Alright it looks like her phone is in town.”

“Address?” She said, putting her phone on speaker and navigating to her ‘notes’ app to type in the address. 

“264 3rd St” he said and Lexa typed the information into her phone. “Do you want me to meet you there?” The man asked quickly. 

“Yes, but Lincoln we have to be quiet. If something’s happened or if he’s there, we need to keep a low profile. Meet me at the northwest corner of the street in 20 minutes, okay?”

“Got it.”

Lexa’s blood was pumping so hard and so fast, she thought she might combust. It was dark now, which would definitely be to their advantage. Part of her thought that maybe she was overreacting and Clarke wasn’t answering her phone because of the argument the day before. The other part of her had a horrible sinking feeling in her stomach that couldn’t be ignored. 

The brunette wasn’t going to take any chances. 

She bolted into the clubhouse, ignoring everyone inside as she made her way to the back where the spare bedroom was. She opened a drawer and found her 9mm pistol, grabbed a clip to load it and put the gun into her shoulder holsters hiding underneath her leather vest. She followed by strapping her razor-sharp blade to her right thigh before taking a deep breath and heading out the back door to her waiting truck. Without a word to any of the other Grounders, she started the engine and headed off into the night towards the blonde’s house.

 

\--------------------

 

Clarke looked into the eyes that were now only inches away from hers, and saw nothing behind them. She recognized it as the ‘thousand-yard stare’, knowing Finn was in the middle of an episode and she was at his manic disposal. It was one of the reasons the blonde broke things off with the man in the first place, telling him to focus on getting some help and being genuinely afraid of what Finn was capable of when he fell into an episode. 

With one hand still covering the blonde’s mouth, he used the other to pet the girl’s hair, smiling in the process. 

“I’m _so_ glad I found you, princess,” he said quietly, continuing his motions. He uncovered the blondes mouth, using both hands to cup her face roughly. 

“HELP!” Clarke screamed loudly, only to have her mouth covered again as she heard a clicking sound and looked down to see the man grab a gun from his waist and bring it up to the woman’s face. 

“No screaming,” he said as the blonde watched his pupils dilate completely. “That’s not how this is going to work, okay?” All Clarke could do was nod, and the man took a deep breath and grinned, putting the gun back in his hip holster.

“What are you doing here?” The doctor said quietly once the man had moved his hand from her mouth to her shoulder, gripping so hard the woman was sure she would be bruised. 

“I had to talk to you, Clarke,” he said simply, giving the woman his signature puppy-dog eyes. “ _Baby_ , I’ve been trying to call you and you keep ignoring my calls and-”

“Finn you can’t be here-” The man slapped the blonde hard across the face, causing her head to whip around as she felt her cheek sting and turn red. 

“Don’t interrupt me,” he spat, his voice lower than before. Clarke looked back at him and couldn’t formulate words, so she stayed silent as he continued to grip both of her shoulders so tightly that he was nearly shaking.

“Finn, _please_ , you’re hurting me,” she whispered and watched as he looked at his hands, slowly releasing his grip on the woman. 

“I’m sorry,” he said, lowering his head slightly before returning his gaze back to the blonde. “I’m sorry, Clarke, I just want to talk, okay?” She nodded her head as her thoughts ran a mile a minute, trying to figure out how to deal with the man and how to possibly escape. Her eyes fell to the jacket on the bed, which held her cell phone, and turned her attention back to her ex.

“Why don’t we sit on the bed and talk, okay?” He smiled and nodded, walking backwards until they reached the bed and sat down. 

“I just...I want to know why you got a restraining order against me, princess,” he asked, cupping the side of her face and causing the woman to flinch at the touch. 

“Finn, I’ve told you why,” she said, looking into his eyes and seeing the same blank stare before continuing. “Finn, you need to get some help, okay? I know you saw a lot of things overseas and you’re dealing with a lot right now and I just think you should really focus on getting better.” She watched as anger started to consume his eyes, his face turning a shade of red as his grip on the woman became tighter again. 

“How many times do I have to tell you, Clarke,” he began, his free hand moving to the gun on his hip, “I don’t have a problem. I’m perfectly _fine_. All I need is _you_.” The blonde swallowed hard and didn’t say anything, watching instead as Finn leaned in to try and kiss her before she gently pushed him away. 

The blonde heard her phone vibrating, and turned toward her jacket, causing Finn to take notice. Clarke lunged at the jacket, but the man moved faster. He grabbed her and threw her against the wall, and her head hit the wall hard. He rummaged through the pockets to find the woman’s phone, and turned his attention to the doctor who had curled up on the floor with her knees to her chest. 

“Who is _Lexa_?” He spat, holding her phone up as if she couldn’t see.

“She’s a friend,” Clarke said, tears beginning to form.

“A _friend_ , huh?” He said, moving closer and crouching down so he was eye-level with the blonde. “She’s called 6 times in the last hour. I know my friends certainly don’t call me six times in an hour, let alone in a day, Clarke.” The doctor could only look at him, which seemed to infuriate the man even more. “Stop lying to me!” He screamed and the blonde shuddered at the volume in such close proximity. “Are you _fucking_ her?” He asked, his face a dark shade of red and his veins beginning to pop out of his neck.

Clarke hesitated, and before she could begin to explain, Finn took the butt-end of his gun and whipped her on her head, causing the woman to fall to the floor. 

“How _dare_ you cheat on me like that,” he spat, grabbing the woman and throwing her onto the bed. The blonde’s vision was blurred and she tried her best to regain her bearings as the man ripped her scrub top, revealing her chest and bare stomach. 

“Finn, _please_!” She yelled, pressing her hands to his chest. “Not like this! Please!” The man looked down on her, seemingly trying to calm himself down. Clarke knew she had to pretend to want the delusional man in order to try and grab hold of the situation. She cupped his face with her hands, and watched as the reddish color left his face. “Gentle, Finn,” she said as she pressed a soft kiss to his lips and felt the man nod in return. 

He lifted himself up on his knees, straddling the woman below him, as he took off his shirt. Clarke spotted a hunting knife strapped to his belt, but returned her attention to Finn as he lowered himself onto the woman, bracing himself with his hands on either side of her head. He kissed her deeper this time, and the blonde ran her hands down his chest slowly, taking her time before coming to the knife at his waist. She took one hand and placed it in between the man’s legs, hearing him let out a soft moan before she moved her other hand and pulled the knife out of the holster in a swift motion, causing the man to lose his balance and drop right onto the blade. 

He looked down the knife lodged just below his right breast, then looked at the blonde who was holding her breath. 

“Clarke…” he breathed out, and the blonde took her opportunity to push him aside and jump up from the bed, grabbing her phone from the floor where Finn left it. She dialed Lexa’s number and looked back at the man who was losing blood at a rapid pace. 

 

\-------------------

 

Lexa got out of her truck as she saw Lincoln pull up, putting her hood over her head to conceal any identity that could be seen. 

“Are you okay?” He asked quietly, and the brunette only nodded. 

“Thank you for coming,” she said before feeling her phone vibrate in her pocket. She pulled it out and saw the only name that had been on her mind. 

“ _Clarke_?! Are you okay?” She asked quickly, noting the heavy breaths on the other end.

“Lexa, I need help,” she said in between tears, and the biker took off in a dead sprint towards the doctor’s house as Lincoln followed behind closely. 

She reached the open garage door and pulled the gun from her holster, motioning for Lincoln to do the same and to move quietly. Lexa opened the door into the house slowly and entered with her gun at her side before she saw Clarke come out of the bedroom. 

“Clarke,” the brunette breathed out, putting the gun back in her holster before gently cupping the other woman’s face, noting the bruising already taking place on the blonde’s shoulders and the mark on her head from the pistol-whipping. 

“He’s in the bedroom,” she whispered and Lexa tensed before Clarke continued. “I...I stabbed him and I didn’t have a choice and-”

“Clarke, it’s _okay_ ,” Lexa soothed, still cupping the woman’s face who relaxed into the touch. “Stay here.” The brunette moved around Clarke to stand in the doorway to the blonde’s bedroom, finding the man sitting against the wall, clutching the area around the blade still lodged in his chest. 

“Lexa, what do I do?” Clarke asked behind the brunette, who turned to face the blonde. She glanced at Lincoln who was standing just inside the doorway to the garage, looking stoic as usual. 

“We can call this in, they’ll take him and charge him with assault. He’ll do a couple of years before he gets out and-”

“ _No_ ,” Clarke cried, grabbing the brunette’s vest. “I can’t do this _again_ , Lexa. I can’t,” she breathed out as the brunette clenched her jaw. 

“Okay, okay,” the biker said, wrapping her arms around the doctor to hold her close. “I’ll take care of it,” she whispered into the blonde’s ear and released her hold to move back into the doorway, pulling her gun from its holster in the process. She noted how pale the man was, clearly losing too much blood. He looked up at the brunette in the doorway and laughed.

“Clarke’s not _gay_ , you dumb bitch,” he said with a sneer, causing the biker to clench her jaw and slowly move closer. “She’ll never be happy with you. She needs me... _ME_!” He screamed and Lexa pulled the trigger, firing a bullet into his head. 

The brunette slowly lowered her gun, smelling the gunpowder and smoke leaving the barrel. She released the breath she had been holding and turned to see Clarke in the doorway, her eyes wide and mouth slightly open. Lexa noticed the tears leaving Clarke’s eyes and she wrapped the woman in a tight hug, holding her as the blonde sobbed into her chest. 

“You’re safe, Clarke,” she said, rubbing the other woman’s back. “You’re safe.” Lexa felt the the blonde nod against her chest, her sobs slowly becoming less frequent after a few minutes as she put most of her weight into the brunette. 

“Lincoln,” Lexa said quietly, looking over to the man who had barely moved since entering the home, “I need you and Gustus to take care of... _this_ ,” the biker said, motioning to the bedroom with her head. The man simply nodded, but Lexa reached into her pocket to retrieve her keys, tossing them to Lincoln. “Can you please bring my truck to the driveway?” She smiled at Lincoln as he gave her a nod before turning to walk out of the door. 

The brunette closed her eyes, wrapping her arms around Clarke again, knowing the blonde was in shock. Lexa had questions, like why Clarke’s top was ripped; if Finn had dared to force her into anything, but she kept those questions at bay, knowing she simply needed to hold the other woman and be there for her. 

When Lincoln returned, Lexa grabbed the other woman’s jacket to cover her up before leading her to the waiting truck. Clarke clung to the woman, and once inside the truck, the blonde didn’t let go of Lexa’s right hand. 

The entire ride to Lexa’s house was quiet as both women were in shock, recalling the events at the house respectively. The silence continued as they reached the home, entering hand in hand before Lexa guided Clarke to her bathroom. She turned on the shower before turning to look at Clarke, seeing her swollen eyes and pale face. The brunette smiled softly, bringing her hands to cup the blonde’s face before leaning in to kiss her forehead. She went to move around the blonde so she could shower, but was stopped by a hand on her forearm. 

“Can you stay?” Clarke asked softly, and Lexa smiled and nodded her head. The biker helped the blonde remove the jacket slowly before Clarke undid the drawstring of her scrubs, letting them drop to the floor. The brunette felt her breath hitch in her throat as the blonde stood before her in her bra and panties, and to Lexa’s surprise, Clarke brought her hands up to take off the brunette’s vest and sweatshirt. Lexa undid her belt and the button to her skinny jeans, pulling them down to the floor before the blonde lifted her cutoff shirt over her head. 

The pair stood in the bathroom for a few moments, taking in the sight of one another. Clarke took a step forward, placing a hand on Lexa’s chest to feel her heartbeat as her other hand cupped the brunette’s cheek. The blonde took a step forward and brought her lips to the other woman’s, instantly feeling the weight leave her shoulders as Lexa brought her hands to the blonde’s hips. Clarke deepened the kiss, running her tongue across Lexa’s bottom lip for permission before moving her hands to undo the brunette’s bra, feeling it fall to the floor. The biker followed suit, deftly removing the blonde’s bra before moving her hands to Clarke’s face, revelling in the feeling of the blonde’s lips against her own. She felt the doctor break the kiss and opened her eyes to find the other woman taking her panties off before stepping backwards into the shower, grabbing the biker’s hand to have her follow. Lexa swiftly removed her own panties before getting into the shower, instantly reconnecting with Clarke’s lips and feeling the blonde press her body against the brunette’s. 

The two women showered together, taking turns lathering each other with soap to wash off the day’s activities in between kisses. More importantly, each knew the other was safe, and that was more than enough for either of them. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay!! Work has gotten the best of me over the last few days and this had to take a little break. 
> 
> Enjoy some short and sweet fluff after all the angst and killing and stuff. As always, let me know your thoughts :)

Lexa woke up at some point in the middle of the night to hear her phone gently vibrate on her bedside table. She leant on her elbow and unlocked her phone to find a text from Lincoln that simply said, “All good.” The brunette knew the body and cleanup had been taken care of, and made a note to treat the boys to something extra nice for taking care of Finn not only for Lexa, but for Clarke as well. 

The biker noticed the blonde was trembling, kicking slightly from an apparent nightmare, so she gently moved over and pressed her body against Clarke’s back, wrapping an arm around her naked waist. The doctor jolted awake, obviously disoriented and scared, and Lexa pressed a gentle kiss to her shoulder and immediately felt the blonde relax. 

“You’re safe, Clarke,” the brunette cooed, feeling the doctor gently pull Lexa’s arm that was atop her waist, pulling the brunette even further into Clarke’s body. The biker enjoyed the naked contact, but not in a sexual way. She loved the feeling of holding the blonde and making her feel safe, especially when the doctor was likely at her most vulnerable. She loved that Clarke trusted her enough to not only let her see her naked form, but to simply sleep without feeling any sort of pressure to have sex. 

Lexa smiled into Clarke’s skin and rested her head in the crook of the other woman’s neck, feeling the blonde’s breathing even out as she fell back into a restful sleep. 

The brunette thought back to the events that led her to be sleeping in the same bed with the woman who had completely captured her attention over the span of about a week and a half. Lexa hadn’t been as worried about another person who wasn’t a member of the club in a long time. She didn’t want to admit to herself that the last person she worried about as much as Clarke was Costia. The biker couldn’t bring herself to compare the two women, knowing she couldn’t go through another loss quite like her former love. 

While the brunette wasn’t about to throw the “love” word out so fast, she knew that her feelings for the doctor were strong and complex. Things with the blonde seemed natural; the way they initially clicked; the way they could talk to each other honestly, or how the blonde could call Lexa on her bullshit quicker than the brunette could find a way to lie; the way Clarke challenged Lexa in a positive way and stood up for herself. 

Clarke was a breath of fresh air for the brunette, and she gently kissed the blonde before letting herself fall back asleep.

 

\--------------------

 

Clarke opened her eyes slowly and saw the sun peaking through the windows and curtains. She went to grab her phone, but realized Lexa was holding her tightly, bringing a smile to the blonde’s face. The doctor loved seeing the softer side of the tough biker, and her sleeping form pressed against Clarke was enough to give the woman butterflies like a schoolgirl. 

Ever so slowly, she leaned towards the bedside table and looked at her phone to see it was well past 9:00. A grumble from behind Clarke made her turn her head ever so slightly to see Lexa opening one sleepy eye, watching the blonde. 

“What time is it?” The brunette asked with a scratchy and groggy tone. Clarke set her phone back on the table and turned so she could see the other woman, their faces only inches apart. 

“It’s after 9:00,” the blonde said softly, taking in Lexa’s soft skin that was wrapped in the sheets. “Don’t you have to work today?” The brunette simply shrugged and opened her eyes to see a confused look on Clarke’s face. 

“I don’t need to go to work,” Lexa said simply and brought her hand to the blonde’s back, rubbing soft circles that made the doctor relax even more. 

“Lexa, you don’t need to miss work because of me,” Clarke said with a guilty look on her face. The blonde knew why the biker was claiming to not have to work after the events of the day before, and while Clarke wanted to stay with Lexa all day, she knew the other woman had a life to live. 

“I know I don’t _need_ to, Clarke,” the brunette said, sleep still evident in her voice. “I _want_ to.” Lexa moved her hand from the blonde’s back to cup the other woman’s face gently. “I want to make sure you know you’re safe. And honestly, I think we both need a day to just relax after...everything,” she said hesitantly, looking at Clarke to gauge her reaction. The blonde moved her hand so it was rested atop Lexa’s hip, forcing a smile onto the brunette’s lips. 

“Lexa, I don’t...I don’t know how to thank you,” Clarke whispered, looking directly into the piercing green eyes. “He probably would have killed me.” 

Lexa’s breath hitched in her throat at the very thought, and she saw a tears trickle from the blonde’s eye. Gently, she took her thumb and wiped it away, scooting closer to the woman and holding her so Clarke was in the crook on her neck. 

“I’m sorry you had to go through that, Clarke,” she said gently, listening to the blonde take deep and heavy breaths as the weight of what happened the night before finally hit the doctor. “I promise you’re safe, okay? He’s gone - he’s _never_ going to hurt you again.” Clarke took some more deep breaths, trying to relax her body as Lexa held her, rubbing circles on her back. 

“Can I ask you something?” Clarke asked softly, and the brunette nodded, causing the blonde to take a deep breath before she spoke. “How did you get to my house so quick? I mean, I called you and you were literally there less than a minute later…” 

Lexa tensed briefly, hoping the doctor didn’t think she was being stalked by the biker. Finn had already stalked her and tried to kill her - she didn’t need any more thoughts of being unsafe. 

“I...did a little research yesterday,” she began, and Clarke pulled away so she could look at Lexa while she spoke. “I wanted to know more about this guy that kept calling you and was obviously making you upset, so I used Anya’s Facebook account to look you up, then figured Finn had to be the ex who was bugging you, and when I saw he was in the Army, I kind of...freaked out,” the brunette said, taking a breath after realizing she was rambling. “Lincoln has a friend up at Fort Lewis, so he called him and discovered Finn was listed as AWOL, so I went to your house.”

Clarke looked at the other woman with a perplexed expression, soaking in the information Lexa had told her. The blonde licked her lips then pursed the, searching for words. 

“You went to my house to...what? Keep watch? Be my bodyguard?”

“I was afraid something had happened to you,” Lexa replied quickly. The response caught the blonde off-guard, and she tilted her head questioningly. 

“Why would you think that?”

“You hadn’t answered any of my calls or texts,” the brunette said softly, not wanting to cause a fight or upset the other woman. 

“Yeah...I was kind of pissed at you,” Clarke said with a soft smile, causing Lexa to relax slightly. 

“I know, I just...I wanted to make sure you were okay. You called me right as I was at the corner of your street, so I ran.” 

Clarke looked into the biker’s piercing green eyes and saw nothing but compassion. The blonde laid back so she could cup the other woman’s face, tracing her jawline slowly with her thumb. 

“You’re confusing, Lexa Woods,” the doctor said with a wry smile, causing a small huff to leave the brunette’s lips. “You tell me I’m not safe with you, then you show up at my house and basically come to my rescue…”

“I like to think of myself as complex, not confusing,” the biker countered, causing the blonde to roll her eyes. “I just don’t want you to get tied up in club business,” she continued, placing a hand on the blonde’s hip, rubbing circles into the soft skin. Clarke hesitated, not sure if she should reveal the research she had done into Lexa’s past. 

“Lexa,” the blonde whispered, continuing to stroke the other woman’s jaw, “I’m not Costia. I could never be her and I would never want to replace her.”

“How-”

“I did some research of my own,” the blonde admitted with a shy smile. “I know you want to keep me safe and you don’t want me getting mixed in with the club, but Lexa,” Clarke said, scooting closer to the other woman who was breathing significantly quicker, “I really like you, regardless of the club or its business.”

Lexa moved her hand from Clarke’s hip to cup the blonde’s face, and pressed her lips to Clarke’s. The doctor hummed in approval and kissed back before she felt Lexa rest her forehead against the other woman’s, pausing to try and regulate her breathing and heart rate. 

“Can I make you breakfast?” The biker asked softly, causing Clarke to laugh and place a quick peck on Lexa’s lips. 

“I thought you’d never ask. I’m starving.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry about the delay!!!!!!
> 
> As I said in my other story (All's Fair In Love and War), life has kind of gotten the best of me lately and I haven't found the time to write anything that I actually liked. 
> 
> With that said, here's an update! Let me know what you think :)

With a large sense of uncertainty, Lexa left Clarke to return back to the shop 36 hours after the incident with Finn. The two women spent the entire day together, lazily watching movies and making food to keep their mind off of the horrific events that took place at the doctor’s home. Clarke wasn’t ready to go back to the very place where she had nearly been killed, and had agreed to just take it easy at Lexa’s. 

The hum of the motorcycle underneath the brunette was somewhat therapeutic, helping the biker to forget how she shot and killed someone. While violence was almost a daily occurrence to the woman, killing Finn felt different to Lexa - it was emotionally charged and affected her in a way like nothing ever had before. A sick feeling had taken residence in her stomach since she pulled the trigger, and any thought of the events gave her goosebumps. 

The brunette roared into the auto yard and knew all eyes were on her. She kept her eyes forward and parked her bike in her usual spot, just as she had done a million times before. The biker took a deep breath before removing her helmet and walking towards the office, noticing a familiar female figure standing in the doorway, her arms crossed over her chest. 

“Look what the cat  _ finally _ drug in,” Anya spat as Lexa neared. “Part of me doesn’t even want to know what the  _ fuck _ you’ve been up, but the other part of me wants to know what the fuck was more important than your family here, Lexa,” the older woman continued as Lexa pulled her work shirt from a hook in the garage. The younger brunette took a deep breath as she quickly buttoned up her shirt, avoiding the other woman’s eyes. 

“It’s a long story,” Lexa said quietly, briefly looking at the other woman before moving towards a motorcycle in need of a new exhaust. 

“Judging by your absence, I would only expect it to be a long story, you little shit,” Anya said, grabbing the younger woman’s shoulder to turn her around, forcing eye contact. “What the fuck happened?”

“Anya, I can’t really talk about it-”

“You can’t  _ talk about it _ ?!” Anya yelled in response with wide eyes. “You have my husband out in the middle of the night doing some ‘favor’ for you and you don’t have the fucking balls to tell me why?” she spat, her face inches away from Lexa’s. 

“Anya, you know it isn’t like that,” the younger biker responded, cowering a bit more than usual. 

“Un- _ fucking _ -believable. Seriously, you storm in here 2 days ago demanding to use my Facebook, then you bolt out of here like your ass is on fire and drag Gus out of bed in the middle of the night and you won’t even tell me  _ why _ ?” Lexa just looked at the floor, unable to make eye contact with the woman she respected more than anyone. 

“Everything okay in here?” Gustus said from the door of the garage, his eyes filled with concern. Anya looked his way with a huff, finally stepping away from Lexa to give the women some breathing room. 

“Whatever you two did,” Anya said, motioning between Gustus and Lexa, “I better hear about it. Sooner rather than later or we’re all going to have some fucking problems,” she said before storming back into the office, slamming the door shut behind her. 

Lexa took a deep breath before briefly glancing in Gustus’ direction before returning her attention back to the broken motorcycle. She felt his eyes on her, and the sick feeling in her stomach was beginning to feel like actual bile creeping into her throat. 

“Are you okay?” He asked quietly, slowly moving in her direction. All she could do was nod her head, knowing her words would most likely give away her true anxiety over what happened to Finn. 

Gustus stopped moving in her direction, instead taking a moment to look over the younger woman. 

“I’m here if you need anything, okay?” He said softly, waiting to move until his eyes met Lexa’s. She looked up and mustered the best smile she could. 

“Thanks, Gus,” she said softly before returning her attention back to the bike, trying to ignore the sick feeling in her stomach and the headache pounding in between her ears. 

 

\---------------------

 

Lexa was never really a “worrying” type. 

Until she met Clarke Griffin. 

First it was the creepy guy who kept calling the blonde. Then it was the fact that said creepy guy showed up and nearly killed the blonde. Now it was the simple fact that Clarke wasn’t responding to texts after the doctor had witnessed her ex-boyfriend’s murder two days ago. 

The biker was in no position to leave work at any point during the day after being MIA the day before. She couldn’t ask Gustus or Lincoln to run home and check for her after everything they did to remove any evidence of Finn Collins. Instead, the sick feeling that began that morning only intensified throughout the day.

By the time 5:00pm rolled around, the brunette was ready to burn some rubber out of the auto yard, racing home to check on the blonde doctor. Her heart was racing the entire ride home, her mind spinning with every possible scenario of why the woman who had turned her life upside down wasn’t answering her phone. 

The bike was hardly turned off before Lexa was racing in through the garage door, quickly finding the house to be empty. Exhaustion and anxiety quickly set in as she wracked her brain on what the next step was. She sat down at the kitchen counter, feeling something under her leg: Clarke’s phone. The brunette picked it up and pressed the home button, illuminating the screen to find a number of texts from herself. She scrolled through, looking for any evidence of where the blonde might be. 

After scrolling for what felt like an eternity (but was actually less than 15 seconds), she saw a text from someone named “Joan” thanking the doctor for “coming in on such late notice”. Lexa felt herself breathe again before placing the phone in the pocket of her leather jacket. She internally berated herself for feeling so out-of-sorts over not hearing from the blonde, but decided to return the phone to the doctor regardless. She convinced herself she would want someone to do the same for her and not tried not to pay any attention to the overwhelming need to see Clarke Griffin in person with her very own eyes. 

 

\--------------------

 

“Excuse me, could you please page Dr. Clarke Griffin?” Lexa asked the woman at the front reception desk after walking through the front entrance to the hospital, which was quickly becoming familiar territory. 

“May I ask what this pertains to?” the woman responded dryly after looking the brunette up and down. Lexa wasn’t in the mood to cause a scene, and decided to calmly explain to the woman why she needed the doctor. 

The brunette took a seat in the waiting room, resting her elbows on her thighs while her fingers gently rubbed circles into her temples in hopes it would alleviate the pounding in her head. Everything from the past two days was hitting the biker: the adrenaline and panic of worrying about Clarke, killing Finn, her inability to disclose the events to Anya and now running down to the hospital to return a phone to the girl at the center of the whirlwind. The last time the biker could remember feeling like this was when Costia died, and that fact alone scared the shit out of Lexa. 

“Hey,” a calm voice said, bringing the brunette out of her trance. She looked up to find those sparkling blue eyes, and immediately felt at ease. 

“Hi, I hope I didn’t take you away from something important,” Lexa responded as Clarke pulled up a chair in front of her. 

“No, no of course not,” Clarke said quickly. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, you left your phone at my place and I figured you might want it,” the brunette said calmly, reaching for the phone in her pocket. 

“You didn’t have to come all the way down here, Lexa,” the blonde said, locking eyes with the greens looking back her her. 

“It’s really no big deal,” the biker said with a tired smile. “Are  _ you _ okay, Clarke? I mean, I thought you were just going to lay low after...everything.”

Clarke licked her lips nervously and took a deep breath. 

“Honestly? I couldn’t sit around the house and do nothing. It was too quiet and I just needed... _ something _ to think about other than what happened.”

“I know what you mean,” Lexa said quietly, looking at her hands which were clasped tightly together. The pair sat quietly together for a few moments, unsure of what to say. 

“Does it get...easier?” Clarke asked, forcing Lexa to look up and into the blonde’s eyes. 

“I don’t know,” the brunette responded. “This is new for me.” Clarke’s eyebrow quirked, questioning whether Lexa was lying or not. 

“This is new for you?” The question made the biker laugh slightly, knowing the doctor was assuming she had killed people before. 

“I’m not a monster, Clarke,” Lexa responded with a wry smile. “This whole thing was really...emotional,” she said, never taking her eyes off the other woman to gauge her reaction. The doctor simply nodded, and covered Lexa’s hands with her own, rubbing small circles over the calloused skin. 

“I should be done here around seven tonight,” Clarke said quietly, noticing the dark circles under the brunette’s eyes. “How about I bring some pizza over to your place and we can watch stupid movies all night?” 

Lexa couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face. Clarke always seemed to know how to lift the brunette’s spirits. 

“Sounds good to me, doc.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, um...sorry for the delay????? 
> 
> I could give you a thousand excuses, but there are none besides the fact that I have sucked with this story. Here's a short chapter to try and get my juices flowing again. 
> 
> From here on out, it may not follow SOA to a T, but certain ideas/themes will be sources of plot-line inspiration. 
> 
> Let me know what you think! I'm rusty, so don't hold back.

“Why do you need me there, Titus?” the brunette sneered at the older man, turning her attention from the motorcycle she was working on to the club president who was standing in front of her.

“It’s a patch-over, Lexa. You’re the fucking VP. Why the fuck wouldn’t you be there?” he answered, annoyance written all over his face.

A few weeks had gone by since Finn’s death, and a sense of normalcy had finally returned to both of Clarke and Lexa’s life. The blonde had kept busy at the hospital with a higher number of traumas due to the impending summer weather, and the brunette had managed to stay busy with club business that didn’t involve death, murder, or torture. 

Lexa knew that leaving the city for a patch-over ceremony meant leaving Clarke alone, and the thought of her alone was reason enough for a little anxiety. 

“If you’re seriously considering not going because of Dr. Griffin, you better think again,” Titus warned, moving closer to the brunette. “This club...this club comes first. It always has, and it always will. Do you hear me?” He said, inches away from the woman’s face now. 

“When do we leave?” She spat back, gritting her teeth. 

“Tomorrow morning. Do whatever the fuck you have to do tonight to change your fucking attitude. I’m sick of this bullshit, Lexa.” The brunette gritted her teeth as she turned to watch Titus slam the door to the shop office. Her head knew the club always came first, but her heart was starting to sing a different tune. 

 

\--------------------------

 

Clarke finally found a few minutes to try and eat something after a rollover accident in the canyons had brought her two trauma patients, taking up most of her morning. She stretched her arms and craned her neck as she mulled over her options in the hospital cafeteria. Before she could decide, she felt her phone vibrating in her pocket, causing her to smile when she saw who it was.

“‘Sup, rocket nerd,” the blonde said cooly, listening to the woman on the other end scoff. 

“Says the medical doctor nerd. What the fuck, Griffin?! I haven’t heard from you in weeks and _that’s_ how you’re gonna greet me?”

“Sorry, Raven. Let me start again: Raven, my _dearest_ and long-lost friend from a far off land called, _Seattle_ ,” the blonde said dramatically. She could practically hear the other woman’s eyes rolling on the other end of the line. 

“Get a life, doc. Seriously though, what’s up? What’s new? How’s life?”

“Life’s good, busy with work but what else is new,” the blonde said, still mulling over her food choices. “Hey, which bag of chips should I get: cool ranch Doritos or those Funyon things?”

“Cool ranch, dude. How is that even a question?” Clarke laughed and snatched the bag of chips before walking to the register and handing the clerk a $5. “Hey, whatever happened with that Finn stuff? Did he ever stop calling you?” 

The blonde almost dropped her phone at the very question. It’s not as though she had forgotten about what happened to her ex, but she had tried very hard to try and forget. 

“I...I uh….hold on a second,” Clarke said softly, grabbing her change from the clerk and quickly heading to a quiet area. The doctor was starting to feel nauseous and her eyesight was becoming spotty as she thought of how to tell Raven what really happened to Finn. 

“Jesus, Clarke, what did you do to the poor bastard, huh?” Raven laughed lightly, but when Clarke didn’t respond, the tone in her voice changed. “Clarke...is everything okay? Did something happen?”

“Listen, Ray, it’s really... _complicated_.”

“I can do complicated, blondie. You know this.” The doctor took a deep breath before she could even think about explaining. 

“He...he found me and-”

“WHAT?! Wait a fucking second Clarke-”

“Ray, just stop and let me explain, okay?” The blonde looked around, making sure she was alone before heading into a deadend hallway she knew was always empty. She took a deep breath again and continued. “I came home from shift one night and he was in my house... _waiting_ for me.” She had to pause and compose herself before she could finish the story. “I mean, he was...deranged, completely out of his mind, Ray. He kept saying that he ‘found me’ and kept asking why I wasn’t returning his phone calls and…” the blonde stopped, feeling tears starting to well behind her eyes as the memories kept flooding back. “He um...he had weapons so I had to just go along with it and-”

“What the fuck did he do to you, Clarke?” Raven spat, cutting the blonde off. “I swear to God if he forced you into anything I will fucking hunt that sorry mother fucker down and-”

“Ray, stop. No, he didn’t... _force_ me. He tried, but…” Clarke paused again, trying to figure out how to tell her best friend that she stabbed her ex. 

“But what, Clarke?!”

“I stabbed him,” the blonde said quickly, nearly cutting the other woman off. There was a pause on the other end, and Clarke simply waited for Raven to respond. 

“You... _stabbed_ him?” She asked. The doctor couldn’t even respond, so the other woman continued. “What….did he...oh god, Clarke-”

“I didn’t kill him, Ray,” Clarke said, tears starting to fall down her cheeks. “It was enough to stun him so I could get away and call for help.”

“So you called the police and-”

“No,” the blonde said, cutting off her best friend before she could finish. 

“What do you mean, ‘ _no_ ’?”

“I called Lexa.” There was another pause and Clarke had to close her eyes and sit down, suddenly feeling light-headed. 

“Wait, the biker chick? Jesus, Clarke…”

“I know, I know but I didn’t know what to do.”

“Okay, okay. So you called the biker chick…”

“She was already at the corner of my street because she had somehow figured out that Finn was AWOL so she came running into the house to...help me.” 

Clarke could practically hear every breath on the other end of the phone. 

“What do you mean, ‘helped you’? Blondie this is some shit-”

“She killed him,” Clarke said quickly. Bile rose into her mouth and she was almost certain she was going to vomit.

“Uhh...wow, uh okay. So there’s the bombshell,” Raven said sarcastically, causing the doctor to smile ever-so-slightly. “Let me get this straight, Griffin: you’ve fallen in love with a biker chick who’s in a biker gang, and she killed your psychotic ex-boyfriend for you?”

“Raven…”

“Okay, I’m sorry. That was a little on the edgy side, but seriously?! So, wait a second...where is...the body?”

“I...don’t know. Lexa’s guys took care of it.” Raven finally laughed, but in complete disbelief. 

“Clarke Griffin,” the other woman started, “You’re fucking with me. You are actually fucking kidding me right now, aren’t you? God you’re so funny sometimes-”

“I’m not kidding, Raven. And I think it goes without saying that this HAS to stay between us. No one, and I mean not even you’re stupid pet snake, can know anything about this.”

“I’m coming to visit you ASAP, blondie. Fuck...are you okay? My god!” Clarke laughed a little, finally letting out the tension she had been holding. 

“Yeah, I’m somehow...okay, I think?” The blonde’s pager went off, and she sighed as she looked at the unopened bag of chips. “Hey, my pager just went off so I have to run, but I would love for you to visit, okay? I’m sorry. I love you, Ray!”

“I love you too, you little scoundral.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are about to get crrrrrrazy!!!!
> 
> But before they do, a little fluff. 
> 
> Enjoy! Let me know what you think!

“Whatever it is that you’re cooking in there, it smells delicious,” Clarke yelled from the living room where she was wrapping up some last minute dictations on patient charts from earlier in the day. She grabbed her glass of wine, took a healthy sip, and craned her neck, trying to work the knot out in her shoulder that had been giving her trouble for days. 

“Well, it’s almost ready so stop working so hard so you can come and enjoy it,” Lexa said softly before she walked up behind the blonde and started to gently massage her shoulders, letting the woman fall into her touch. 

“Or you could just do that for the rest of the night,” the doctor purred.

“Eat first, then I can take care of you for the rest of the night,” the brunette said softly into the other woman’s ear before kissing the top of her head and returning to the kitchen. 

“How long are you going to be gone on this ‘patch-over’ thing anyways?” the doctor asked as she walked into the kitchen, leaning against the counter as she watched the other woman dish their meal onto the shiny white plates. 

“Hopefully no more than a couple of days if everything goes according to plan,” Lexa replied. The brunette turned to see a worried look on the doctor’s face. “Clarke, it’s going to be fine,” she said, walking over to the other woman and placing her hands on the blonde’s hips. 

“Is it...dangerous?” Clarke asked softly, averting her eyes. Lexa smiled before bringing her right hand to the blonde’s chin to slowly tilt the other woman’s head up to look into the crystal-blue eyes. 

“I’ll be careful, okay? I promise,” the brunette said, sealing her promise with a kiss before Clarke’s doorbell rang. The two women looked at each other, confusion written on both of their faces. “Are you expecting someone?” Lexa asked quickly. When the blonde simply shook her head, the biker grabbed her gun that was sitting on the counter and slowly headed towards the front hallway. Clarke moved around the counter and walked to the front door, looking back at the brunette before peering through the glass to see who it was. 

“ _Mom_? What are you doing here?” the blonde asked, opening the door to see the older woman standing there, concern written on her face. Lexa quickly placed the gun in the back of her waistband before Abby could see it. 

“I’ve barely seen you over the last couple weeks and I wanted to make sure everything is okay, but,” she stopped, staring at Lexa with an icy expression on her face, “I can now see why you’ve been avoiding me.”

“Dr. Griffin,” Lexa said softly, standing awkwardly in the living room. All three women stood there for a few moments, unsure of what to say next. “I, uh, made dinner if you’d like to join us?” the brunette said, finally breaking the silence. Clarke looked at her mother, who finally nodded her head after a few seconds and entered the house. 

 

\--------------------------

 

After an incredibly awkward dinner together, the three women were all cleaning up the kitchen in more awkward silence. 

“Hey, can I talk to your mother... _alone_?” Lexa whispered into Clark’s ear as the blonde dried the dishes. The doctor looked at her with a puzzled expression, and Lexa just nodded, affirming she was sure she wanted to be alone with the older Griffin woman. 

“If you both don’t mind, I’m going to go shower real quick. Haven’t been able to since I got home from shift,” she said, slowly backing out of the kitchen to watch her mother’s concerned expression. As soon as Lexa heard Clarke’s bedroom door shut, she turned her attention to the older woman. 

“Dr. Griffin, I-”

“How do you think this is going to end up, Lexa?” Abby said quickly, cutting her off and making direct eye contact with the younger woman, throwing the biker off. “Do you really think I’m stupid enough not to realize what you’re doing?”

“What I’m _doing_?” Lexa asked, anger starting to bubble in her gut. 

“Lexa, I’ve lived here much longer than Clarke has. I’m much more familiar with how your MC operates than my daughter is. I’ve heard stories; I’ve seen the news; I’ve seen the carnage at the hospital with my own eyes.” Lexa refused to break eye contact, letting the other woman finish before she started to speak. “I refuse to let my daughter get mixed in with your club business. She’s not some girl you can use and then toss away when you’re bored and done with her. You can’t ‘play house’ with her one night and screw some hooker the next night, do you hear me?”

The biker’s jaw was clenched. She was fuming on the inside, but she reminded herself to stay calm and breathe. 

“Dr. Griffin, I care about your daughter, _a lot_ ,” she said, feeling herself relax ever-so-slightly. “I know the reputation that the MC has. I know I’ve made my fair share of mistakes, but meeting your daughter and getting to know her is not one of them.” Lexa watched Abby’s eyes closely, not seeing her resolve break at all. “Clarke is extraordinary, and I promise you I will not hurt her. I won’t let anyone else hurt her,” she said, her voice breaking towards the end. 

“She’s been through enough hurt and pain, Lexa,” Abby said quietly, knowing the blonde could very-well be listening to their conversation. “Her father’s death nearly broke her and I _refuse_ to see her hurt like that ever again, do you hear me?” All the brunette could do was nod her head and keep eye contact with the older woman. “I will make your life a living hell if anything happens to Clarke, understand?”

“I understand,” Lexa said firmly. The two stared each other down for a few moments before Abby finally spoke up. 

“Fine. Now help me put these dishes away.”

 

\-------------------------------

 

“I’m sorry about my mother,” Clarke said, her voice muffled into the pillow as Lexa straddled her hips and slowly massaged her naked back. “I should be massaging you for the stress she induced this evening.” The brunette laughed lightly and continued working on the blonde’s exposed back. 

“Clarke, you really don’t need to keep apologizing. She loves and cares about you. How could I be mad about that?” The blonde thought about it, but was more mesmerized by the way Lexa’s hands were moving across her back, somehow applying the perfect amount of pressure to both release tension and relax the blonde’s muscles. 

“You’re really good at this,” Clarke said softly, her voice still muffled by the pillows. The brunette laughed again, and bent over to press a soft kiss at the base of the blonde’s neck. 

“Strong hands; helps when you work on motorcycles day in and day out,” Lexa replied before Clarke began to roll over to face the biker. The brunette could feel her heart skip a beat then increase at the sight of the beautifully naked woman beneath her. The blonde couldn’t miss the way Lexa’s breath hitched in her throat, and a smirk formed on the doctor’s lips. 

“Like what you see?” the blonde joked before gently tugging on the other woman’s t-shirt to bring her down and into a kiss. Lexa met her lips softly at first before sliding her tongue in to deepen the kiss, hearing the blonde moan softly in response. Clarke quickly brought the brunette’s shirt up and over her head, leaving the biker topless on top of the doctor as their tongues crashed against each other. The blonde couldn’t help but grind her hips into the other woman’s as the burning in her core started to drive her crazy. 

“You are so fucking beautiful, Clarke,” Lexa whispered in the other woman’s ear before slowly kissing down her neck, sending the blonde into overdrive. 

“Lexa, please,” Clarke begged. Lexa paused briefly, staring into deep blue eyes and ran a thumb across the blonde’s now swollen lips before slowly sliding her body down so her mouth could meet the blonde’s chest, never breaking eye contact. When the brunette’s mouth found Clarke’s nipple, the blonde couldn’t help but push her head into the pillow and revel in the feeling of Lexa’s tongue against her sensitive bud. 

The biker couldn’t help but smile as she brought her left hand to Clarke’s other breast, gently squeezing and pinching the other nipple, nearly sending the blonde over the edge right then and there. Lexa could feel how wet the other woman was with Clarke’s core pressed against her stomach. She slowly brought her hand down the blonde’s torso, stopping just short of where the doctor needed her most. 

“ _Fuck_ , Lexa,” Clarke whispered, writhing beneath Lexa. Before Clarke could say another word, the brunette slipped her hand underneath the blonde’s waistband and moaned when she felt how wet the other woman was. 

“Oh my god, Clarke,” Lexa whispered, finding the other woman looking at her with lustful eyes. The brunette practically ripped the blonde’s panties off her body before slipping a finger in Clarke’s waiting core, keeping eye contact as she slowly pumped in and out. 

“I need more,” the blonde moaned, her hips finding a rhythm with Lexa’s hand. The biker smiled as she slipped another finger in quickly and watched as Clarke’s hips bucked instantly. 

Lexa quickened her pace slightly, returning her tongue to the blonde’s sensitive nipple and felt the doctor begin to clench around her curling fingers. The brunette could feel the blonde’s body temperature and feel her heart rate begin to quicken as she continued to methodically move her fingers in and out of Clarke’s wet core. 

“Fuck, I’m so close,” the blonde moaned, and Lexa quickly moved her tongue from Clarke’s nipple down to her clit, feeling the doctor grip the sheets and begin to whimper. The brunette continued to slowly circle the bundle of nerves with her tongue as she pumped and curled her fingers on Clarke’s g-spot, feeling the woman starting to tremble before the blonde grabbed Lexa’s hair, holding her in place and she came around the brunette’s fingers. 

Clarke held her there for a few moments, her body shuddering from the intense orgasm, before she fell back into the bed trying to catch her breath. Lexa slowly kissed up the blonde’s body, removing her fingers ever so slowly from the doctor’s sensitive core before finally reaching Clarke’s lips, kissing her softly. 

The blonde smiled into the kiss, grabbing Lexa’s face to kiss her deeply before opening her eyes to see a different shade of green eyes looking back at her. 

“Are you sure you have to leave in the morning?” Clarke asked playfully, her voice husky and full of want. 

“I wish I didn’t,” Lexa answered honestly. The brunette watched the other woman scan her face before Clarke quickly turned and forced Lexa onto her back. 

“We better make the most of the night then,” the blonde answered, kissing the biker deeply. 

 

\----------------

 

“You’re sure they know?” the deputy asked, trying to hide his nervousness around the club president. 

“Positive,” Titus replied, taking a quick drag from his cigarette in the dark night, his face illuminated only by the moon. “Why else would Gustus and Lexa meet Roan out in the middle of nowhere? This shit is complicated enough as it is.”

“What you propose we do about it?” Emmerson asked before taking a drag of his own cigarette. He watched as the older man looked off into the distance, thinking carefully about his next move. “You want the doctor gone?”

“No,” Titus replied quickly, looking Emmerson in the eyes. “Lexa wouldn’t have told her yet. She’s just an innocent pain in my ass right now.” The president paused for a moment, taking another drag before continuing. “Gustus has to go. He’s too close to Lexa and would help her do anything at this point.”

“What about Lexa?” Emmerson replied tentatively. 

“I’ll take care of her,” Titus replied firmly. The deputy nodded his head carefully, waiting for the older man to continue. “I’ve arranged a bullshit patch-over ceremony tomorrow and Lexa is coming with me. Gustus will be staying back this time. I need you to take care of it while we’re gone,” he said thoughtfully, no remorse shown in his voice. 

“How do you want it done?” Emmerson asked, flicking the ash from his cigarette nervously. 

“Make it look like the Azgeda put a hit on him. Retribution for the big blow up a few weeks ago.” The deputy nodded as Titus took one last drag from his cigarette before dropping it to the ground and stomping it with his steel-toed boot. The older man turned to walk towards his waiting motorcycle, prompting the deputy to turn back towards his car. 

“Emmerson,” Titus called as he buckled the chin strap of his helmet, sitting on his bike before revving the engine, “make it ghetto, make it gangster.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY IT'S BEEN A YEAR SINCE THIS STORY HAS BEEN UPDATED!!!
> 
> I won't waste your time with excuses, but I felt the writing itch recently and attempted to bring this story back to life. The chapter is short, but I'm trying to dust it off and keep it going. 
> 
> Please leave some comments and let me know what you think! Thanks for reading!

Lexa woke up to the sound of her alarm early the next morning, audibly moaning at the wretched sound her phone was making. The night had been pure bliss, and the thought of leaving for the patch-over was enough to induce a headache due to dread. 

She rolled her body over, expecting to find the blonde sleeping next to her, but the bed was empty. Her eyes shot open, and as she looked around the room for any sign of the doctor, her brief panic was spoiled by the smell of something delicious coming from the kitchen. 

The brunette walked sleepily into the kitchen to find Clarke finishing up a freshly cooked breakfast.

“Clarke, what are you doing?” Lexa asked with a smile on her face, rubbing the sleep from her eyes as she slowly made her way to the barstools at the kitchen counter. “It’s so _early_.”

“Yes, BUT you have a long day ahead of you, and I wanted to make sure you had enough to eat before you go to this, patch-over, or whatever,” the blonde stated matter-of-fact. Lexa couldn’t help but smile, and saw a blush creep onto the doctor’s face. 

“That might be the cutest, most adorable thing anyone has ever said to me. Or done for me,” the biker stated as she moved around the counter and wrapped Clarke into a hug. “Did you decide to pick up that extra shift today?”

“Yeah, I figured if you were going to be gone, it’s better to work than be alone or, worse, have to spend time with my mother,” the blonde said with a roll of her eyes. Lexa simply smiled, took a deep breath and looked over to where her breakfast was waiting. She felt a sense of want in this moment with Clarke; wanting to simply wake up and have breakfast with the doctor before she went to work; to have a “normal” life instead of patch-overs, torture, gun running, and anything else the club had business in. 

“Are you okay?” Clarke asked softly, bringing the brunette back to reality from being lost in her thoughts. 

“Yes, just tired. You kept me very busy last night,” she said with a wink, pulling the blonde in for a quick kiss before sitting down at the counter to eat breakfast. 

“Well, I would say I’m sorry for keeping you up, but, I’m not.”

The pair ate their breakfast in smiles and shared looks, both dreading the upcoming time apart. 

 

\--------------------------

 

The ride from Clarke’s place to the MC forced Lexa out of her domestic bliss with Clarke and back into business mode. She knew patch-overs were serious business and distractions had to be at a minimum, but that feeling in her stomach of wanting a different life just couldn’t escape the biker, no matter how hard she tried. 

The brunette saw Titus waiting for her as she pulled into the shop, and she took a deep breath to prepare herself for the upcoming, unwanted alone time with the MC President. 

“You’re late,” the man said without missing a beat as soon as Lexa cut the bike’s engine. 

“Well I’m here now,” she replied, tightening the straps across the bags attached to her motorcycle. She saw the older man’s jaw clench and his chest puff out to take a deep breath. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Gustus watching intently from one of the garage doors of the shop.

“I need you focused, Lexa,” Titus said, forcing the brunette to look back at him. 

“Yeah, I  _ am _ focused. I don’t know why you’re so hell bent on believing I’m not,” she lied, crossing her arms across her chest. 

“You know exactly why,” he replied, moving closer to the younger woman. “This patch-over, it’s important, so get your head out of your ass, Lexa. I need my Vice President, not some dumb girl in love.”

It took everything within Lexa’s being not to punch the older man in the face. Instead, she clenched her jaw, gritted her teeth and moved around him to walk to the shop. 

“I need to check in with Gustus, then we can leave,” she said as she felt her face flush with anger. She stuffed her hands in her pockets as she approached Gustus, who turned his attention from the bike he was working on to the brunette as she approached. 

“Everything okay?” he asked, but Lexa knew her best friend didn’t really even have to ask. She took a deep breath before replying, nodding her head as she looked around the shop. 

“Yeah, he’s just a dick. Listen, you haven’t heard any more from Roan, have you?”

“No, not since our meeting. Have you said anything to anyone else?” the man asked, looked around Lexa to make sure no one could hear their conversation. 

“No, and it needs to stay that way,” she replied quickly, making eye contact with Gustus. “Listen, I need you to see if you can find any more info about it and if,” she paused, making sure Gustus was looking at her, “if Titus was involved. I need to know, Gus.” 

The bigger man simply nodded and squeezed her arm, acknowledging his understanding. 

“Thanks, Gus. I better go before he asks any questions,” she said, turning around to head back to her motorcycle. 

“Be careful, Lexa,” he said. He paused, looked back and smiled before returning her attention to the waiting Titus. 

 

\--------------------------------------

 

Lexa hard warned Clarke that she wouldn’t be able to keep in touch while she was at the patch-over. Between riding a motorcycle, which didn’t leave much room to text and ride, and the lack of service in whatever bum-fuck town they were going to, contact would be at a minimum. 

That didn’t stop Clarke from checking her phone every 10 minutes, just to see if  _ maybe _ the brunette had managed to text her. 

16 hours into her 24 hour shift and the blonde had to try and keep her focus on medicine, which was hard to do when the day had been slow without any major traumas. A few broken bones here and there, but nothing to really get her adrenaline pumping. 

Until 11:16pm when she got the call for a multiple-GSW victim. 

“Unidentified female, late 20s or early 30s, with multiple GSW’s to the chest and abdomen,” the ER tech told her as she prepared her trauma gown, the ambulance siren getting louder as they approached the hospital. 

The blonde prepared everything in her mind; what she was about to see and what would immediately need to be done in order to give the woman any chance of living. She prepared a list of medications in her mind, liters of blood that would be needed, and she could feel her own heartbeat begin to beat faster as the adrenaline began pumping through her veins. 

What she couldn’t prepare for was the unmistakable tattoo on the woman’s right arm that was partially covered in blood; the cheekbones that looked like they could cut glass; and the mangled t-shirt that once read “Grounders MC”. 

Anya was on the stretcher being wheeled in as one paramedic continued to perform CPR on the familiar woman who was barely alive. 

  
  



	16. Chapter 16

Clarke knew it was cliche, but it really did feel like everything froze when she realized Anya was on that stretcher coming through the emergency room doors. The doctor was prepared for everything and anything when it came to trauma medicine, but when it was someone you not only knew, but one of the only people she knew Lexa truly trusted, preparation didn’t matter. 

The blonde snapped back into reality as the paramedics ran down the list of information; her vitals, or lack thereof; what little information they had about what happened to the woman; and how many times her heart had stopped en-route (twice). Clarke had to make sure that number didn’t jump to three. 

Her trauma team was waiting for instructions, and as the blonde meticulously went through her list of demands and needs from the team, she couldn’t help but think back to how she had come to know Anya and her snarky personality. 

“I don’t have a pulse,” another doctor said, and Clarke looked at the monitor to see a flatline where the heart rate normally was. 

“Get me the paddles and charge to 300,” she called out quickly, grabbing the defibrillation paddles from a nurse close by. She looked over at the monitor to see the paddles were charged, and yelled ‘clear’ before administering a shock to the woman dying on the table. The blonde held her breath as she watched the monitor for any signs of life. 

After a few seconds, the line was still flat. 

“Charge to 500,” she called again as a knot was quickly forming in her stomach. She once again shocked Anya, silently praying for a miracle. 

Seconds later, which seemed more like an eternity, a tiny blip formed on the heart rate monitor, and the doctor exhaled briefly. 

“Finishing intubating and get her up to the OR immediately,” the blonde said, noting the other woman’s vitals and guiding her surgical team to the prep room. She had already gotten one miracle out of Anya, and now she needed another big one: have the woman survive surgery. 

 

\---------------------------

 

Lexa had been to patch-overs before; this was not her first rodeo. She knew it was more of a gigantic party than anything else. Under normal circumstances, she would have been excited to get away for a few days, get blasted drunk, and maybe spend a few nights with a couple of beautiful women. 

But this trip was different. 

That feeling of want she felt earlier in the morning with Clarke only grew larger with each town she passed on her motorcycle. She didn’t want to drunkenly hook up with some random chick. The brunette knew the open road was usually a place for reflection, and with the steady hum of the motorcycle beneath her, she came to the realization that Clarke Griffin had changed something within her. 

This kind of self-realization would normal cripple the biker with fear and anxiety, but the very thought of the doctor brought a calmness to her. Maybe the beautiful blonde had finally made Lexa realize her potential outside the confines of the Grounders MC. 

“Lexa, for fuck’s sake!” the brunette finally heard as she snapped back to reality, which happened to be a sleazy dive bar somewhere in the middle of nowhere. Titus was glaring at her, beer in one hand and some blonde occupying his other hand. 

“What?” Lexa said cooly, quickly taking a sip of her whiskey to act like she wasn’t thinking about Clarke. 

“The beautiful lady behind the bar asked if you wanted another,” Titus responded, nodding behind Lexa to the waiting bartender, whose shirt revealed more skin than not. 

“Oh, uh, no thanks. I gotta piss, actually,” she said quickly as she headed towards the bathroom before the older man could say anything. Once inside the doors of the bathroom, she took a deep breath and reached for her phone in her back pocket, not surprised to see “No Service” in the top right corner. Lexa sighed and looked in the mirror briefly before turning the cold water on to splash her face. The biker knew she needed to focus for this trip; business was business and no matter how much she thought about Clarke and potentially wanting a normal life, she was here with Titus to conduct business. 

She returned back to the bar to find the blonde girl from before now straddling Titus, a sight sore enough to make Lexa groan to herself. The brunette sat back down at the bar, raising her finger to signal for another whiskey, when another biker came from a door that said “Office”, holding a phone out for Titus. 

“You’ve got a call,” he said simply. Titus smiled and kissed the blonde before responding. 

“Who is it?” He said without looking at the other man, attention still fixed on the girl straddling him. 

“Won’t say, but said it’s important.” Lexa looked at Titus with confusion on her face, and Titus responded with a huff, whispering to the blonde that he would be right back. The President grabbed the phone after the blonde woman reluctantly got off his lap and went to a corner of the bar while the brunette looked on. 

“Yeah... _what_?! What the fuck-” Titus said, looking back towards Lexa with sheer panic written on his face. “Where is she? What do you know?” A sinking feeling began to settle in the brunette’s stomach while Titus’ face grew more pale by the second. “Keep me updated,” he said before ending the call and giving the phone back to the other man. 

“Titus, what the fuck-”

“Anya’s been…” the older man trailed off, looking out a window and Lexa could have sworn she saw tears forming in his eyes. 

“Anya’s _what_?! What’s wrong with Anya?!” Lexa practically screamed, leaving her seat and moving towards the club President. 

“She’s been shot,” he responded, and Lexa wasn’t sure if she had heard the man correctly. “We need to leave. _Now_.”

 

\------------------------------- 

 

“Dr. Griffin, you need to call it.” Clarke knew Dr. Jaha was right. It had been over 6 hours since Anya had been wheeled into the emergency room, bloodied beyond recognition. “You’ve done everything you can.” The older doctor placed a hand on the blonde’s shoulder, encouraging her to do one of the worst parts of her job. 

“Time of death, 5:53,” she stated numbly before stepping down from the platform she was on.

Normally, Clarke would thank everyone in the room for their hard work, but she could hardly breathe, let alone speak. Lexa’s best friend, her mentor and the mother to her godchild, was dead on _her_ operating table. 

The doctor removed her bloodied surgical gown and gloves, and entered the prep room that overlooked the OR. She scrubbed her hands and arms, watching Anya’s body being covered by a white sheet. She went over everything in her head, again: the critical minutes when she first arrived in the ER when Clarke had managed to restart her heart and keep her alive; defibrillating her heart twice more while she laid open on the operating table; how her surgical team kept hanging units of blood so rapidly that an intern had to run and get more in the middle of surgery. She went over techniques, her sutures, the way she meticulously worked on Anya, and the way she had hoped for a miracle. 

Clarke suddenly felt bile rise up in the back of her throat, and she quickly turned around to throw up in the nearest trash can. She heard Dr. Jaha enter moments later, pausing in the door to see the younger doctor hovering over the garbage can. 

“Dr. Griffin,” he started softly, but Clarke put her hand up to stop him. The young doctor knew Dr. Jaha, as a mentor of hers, would try to console Clarke through this difficult surgery. What he didn't know was how emotionally attached she was to Anya, and she didn't need him knowing that. As far as he knew, it was simply one of the hardest cases Clarke had been apart of during her time at the hospital.

“I’m fine. I just...I need to go tell her husband.” The older surgeon pursed his lips and simply nodded, holding the door open for the blonde to walk through. 

 

\---------------------

 

When Lexa and Titus arrived at the hospital sometime around 4am, the scene was as somber as the brunette had ever seen. The whole club was there, some sleeping, some attempting to console and comfort Gustus while they waited for any kind of news. 

Lexa had talked to Gustus in private at some point after arriving, getting the story from him on what happened: they were at Anya's parents house for dinner with the baby, but when it came time to leave, they noticed one of the tires on Anya’s car was nearly flat. Gustus told his wife to take his truck home so he could stop at the gas station to fill her tire up, baby Aidan in tow with him since his truck wasn’t equipped with a car seat. No more than 10 minutes after his wife had left, he drove up to his truck in the middle of the street, bullet holes sprayed across the door and his wife bleeding and unconscious inside. 

“Fucking Azgeda,” Lexa whispered when he had told her. “Those mother fuckers were out to kill _you_.” All Gustus could do was nod, his eyes misty with tears that refused to drop. “Blood will have blood, Gustus.” She hugged him, and waited with the rest of the club. 

It was sometime around 6am that Lexa saw the blonde hair coming through the double doors, and she nearly jumped out of her seat with Gustus. She couldn’t read the expression on the doctor’s face, but the blonde motioned for the both of them to follow her into another room, in private. 

“How is she?” Gustus asked as soon as the door was closed, and the brunette watched the blonde doctor’s stoic expression move from the door handle to the large man in front of her. 

“Gustus, we did everything we could,” she said and Lexa’s heart sank. “Her injuries were too severe and her heart couldn’t handle the trauma. I’m so sorry-”

“No!” The man cried out and dropped to his knees. “Please, no!” He cried out again. Lexa felt like she was going to pass out, frozen in place with her eyes quickly forming tears that began to silently fall. She knelt down to comfort the sobbing man in front of her, and looked up at Clarke who was pinching her blue eyes to keep her own tears from falling. 

“Can we see her?” Lexa croaked out, her voice barely above a whisper. 

“Of course,” Clarke replied, nodding slightly. “I’ll have someone come and get you when she’s...ready,” she added before turning around to exit the small room. Lexa sighed as her tears continued to fall, her mind racing with memories of Anya. It was as if Anya's own life was flashing before the brunette and small sobs finally escaped her body, the realization that her best friend was really dead, as she wrapped her arms around Gustus' neck. They stayed like this until both of them found the strength to get up, walk out of the room and into the waiting arms of their Grounders brothers. 


	17. Chapter 17

Clarke watched the MC from behind the glass of the doctor’s suite that looked into the waiting area on the surgical floor. The police had finished questioning her, collected their evidence and were on their way out as she continued to finish dictating Anya’s report into the hospital file system. Her shift was nearing its end, but the blonde doctor couldn’t get the images of the dead woman out of her mind. 

“Clarke?” The blonde looked up from her computer at the sound of the familiar voice, and found her mother walking into the suite, worry written all over her face. “Is it true?” 

“Anya died this morning,” Clarke said simply, taking a deep breath to control her emotions. Her mother covered her mouth in shock, tears forming behind her eyes. 

“How…”

“Multiple gunshot wounds to the chest and abdomen; blood loss, system failure, you name it. It seems like some kind of retaliation-gone-wrong from what I’ve heard.” Clarke said, exasperated as she looked back to her computer screen, finishing her notes while she heard her mother sit down to process what the blonde had told her. 

“Gustus and the baby…” her mother said, her words drifting as tears began to fall. “Such a senseless act of violence. This town is overrun by guns and drugs and it was never this bad.” All Clarke could do was turn around and take her mother’s hands in her own to rub soft circles on her knuckles. The younger doctor had no more tears to shed after the traumatic night. 

“Dr. Griffin?” Both women looked at the nurse standing in the door, waiting for her to specify which doctor, “Sorry, Clarke, the police are done with your gunshot patient. Her husband and someone named Lexa are asking for you?”

“Thank you, I’ll be right there,” the younger doctor responded, looking at her mother before saying anything. 

“Go, I’ll be fine,” her mother said, squeezing her daughter’s hands as Clarke got up from her seat, grabbing her white coat before exiting the room and heading towards Anya’s room. 

 

\----------------------

 

Lexa watched as Gustus slowly entered his dead wife’s room, pulling a chair up next to her and taking her hand in his before he broke down in tears once again. It was almost too much for the brunette to see, and the feeling of wanting to throw up returned. Tears were stinging in the back of her eyes, but before they could fall, she felt someone walk up beside her. 

It was the only person the biker could have wanted to see in that moment. 

“Clarke,” she whispered, softly grabbing the doctor’s hand and squeezing it as she looked into the blue eyes, seeing pain that she didn’t expect. 

“Lexa, I’m so, so sorry,” the blonde said, looking up towards the ceiling to keep her tears from falling. “I promise we did everything we could.”

“I know,” the brunette said softly, moving her attention from the woman next to her and back to Gustus and Anya. There was minutes of silence as the two women stood there looking into the room, continuing to hold hands. 

“Did she...die well?” Lexa asked after several minutes, choking on her words.

“She fought like hell,” Clarke said, taking a deep breath before continuing, “Anyone with those kinds of injuries should have been dead at the scene, but she just kept fighting to try and live.” 

Clarke looked over to see a steady stream of tears falling down Lexa’s face, and all she wanted to do was embrace the woman and hold her until she was done crying. But she knew she had to stay professional in order not to raise too many questions, especially if Emmerson was lurking around, looking for reasons to continue harassing the blonde doctor. 

The pair continued to watch Gustus as he laid his head on Anya, tears continuing to stream down his bearded face. Lexa looked at the clock on the wall, and took a deep breath before squeezing Clarke’s hand. 

“I should go in there and be with them,” she said quietly, wiping the tears on her face with the sleeve of her hoodie. 

“Please let me know if you need anything, okay?” the blonde replied, squeezing the other woman’s calloused hand. All Lexa could do was nod before heading into the hospital room. 

 

\-----------------------

 

“You better tell me what the fuck happened before I kill you myself,” Titus spat into his burner phone, looking around the dark and empty auto shop office to make sure no one was around. 

“How was I supposed to know she would be in his truck!” Emmerson answered, panic heavy in his voice. 

“Jesus fucking Christ, Emmerson, look before you fucking shoot up the truck!” Titus exhaled deeply as he listened to the other man ramble on about the botched hit that not only left Anya dead, but left a serious mess on Titus’ hands. “We’re going to have an all-out war on our hands, do you understand that?”

“Yes, Titus I do, and I’m _sorry_.”

“‘Sorry’ isn’t going to stop the bloodshed, dipshit. What is the sheriff’s office saying as a motive so far?”

“Retaliation for the market explosion,” Emmerson replied.

“It needs to stay that way, or we’re both fucked, understand?” Titus saw headlights turning into the gates of the MC and quickly ended his phone call before stepping out into the chilly California night, watching as Lexa parked her truck. 

“I’ve been trying to get ahold of you,” the woman said as she walked over to the club President, her eyes puffy and swollen from crying. 

“I needed some time alone, to think,” the man countered, trying his best to look solemn but stoic. 

“Some time _alone_?” she spat back and huffed, “Gustus’ wife was just murdered in cold blood and you need some time alone?”

“We have our own ways of grieving, Lexa,” he replied, anger growing evident in his voice. 

“Well the club needs us right now; Gustus needs us more than ever and-”

“Don’t you think I know that?!” he screamed, catching the brunette completely off-guard. “I know what this club needs!” 

Lexa simply stared at the man with her mouth slightly open in shock. The woman had known Titus her entire life, and she couldn’t remember a time where he had yelled like he was at that moment. 

“We will have a meeting once the funeral is over,” the man said after a few minutes, looking up towards the sky. “Until then, we lay low and properly remember Anya.”

  
  



End file.
